Wednesday, March 29, 2023

Ratings of the season – part 4: The loaners

Having looked at the defence, midfield and attack, it’s time to cast our beady eye on the players out on loan. Some of them are out there to get experience, some of them because we can’t stand the sight of them anymore, but how did they fare?

Ryo Miyaichi – 3/10

Having impressed on loan at Feyenoord and under Owen Coyle’s tutelage at Bolton Wanderers big things were expected of Ryo when he signed a season long loan with Wigan. Unfortunately, despite Roberto Martinez enthusiastically declaring the Japanese international would fit well with the Latics’ passing philosophy, groin and ankle injuries played havoc with his first team chances. His only start came in the Capital One Cup back in September and he made only seven further appearances from the bench.

Highlight of the season: Can one day tell his kids he played against Brazil after coming on as an injury-time substitute in Japan’s October friendly.

Lowlight of the season: After 4 month absence with groin problem he returned against Everton in FA Cup quarter-final only to have his ankle poleaxed within 30 minutes. He was subsequently ruled out for the remainder of the season.

Season trivia: The Japanese ambassador to Austria was nearly expelled from Vienna after Ryo labelled Wigan’s Paul Scharner ‘bat sh*t crazy’ on his blog. To avoid a full-scale diplomatic incident Wagyu cattle were sent as a gift to the Alpine state where they mated with the Laughing Cow.

Next season: Another loan spell probably. Possibly abroad and perhaps with a permanent move in mind.

Denilson – 5/10

Arseblog News can’t be sure, but we think Brazilian football seasons are a bit like dog years and that Denilson may actually have played four or five since returning home to play for Sao Paulo. We know he got sent off a fair bit, scored a comedy own goal or two and pissed off angry locals on Twitter. No doubt he went sideways quite a bit and enjoyed the sunshine.

Highlight of the season: Scored a cracking goal against Palmeiras back in October and Sao Paulo were awarded the Copa Sudamericana title after their opponents Tigre refused to play the second half of the second-leg of the final.

Lowlight of the season: Hilarious own goal against Sao Bernado in March.

Season trivia: Arsene Wenger refuses to answer calls from Denilson after the Brazilian recommended Wellington to the Arsenal scouting team.

Next season: Arsenal will no doubt be trying to offload him permanently this summer with Sao Paulo pondering a bid.

Ju-Young Park – 4/10

Having spent last season at London Colney cataloguing the training cones for Pat Rice, Park was shipped off to Celta Vigo on loan where he’s actually had quite a bit of game time. Three goals in 22 games is an upturn on his debut year at Arsenal but it hasn’t stopped Vigo from being relegated from La Liga.

Highlight of the season: Being out of harms way having avoided national service back in South Korea.

Lowlight of the season: The risk posed to his countrymen by Kim Jong-un.

Season trivia: The first Korean to score in La Liga, Park celebrated the landmark moment by going out clubbing with his teammates. Alas, he was turned away by the doormen at Galicia’s most renowned drum n’bass night for wearing the wrong shoes and carrying a knuckleduster.

Next season: He’ll likely leave Arsenal this summer. Good luck to him.

Nicklas Bendtner – 0/10

Last summer there was all the usual talk of how many options he had and how all the clubs wanted him and how he just had to choo-choo-choose one, but The Greatest Striker That Ever Lived only moved to Juventus on deadline day. Made just 9 Serie A appearances (2 starts), failed to score a goal and tore his groin so badly he had to have gender reassignment surgery. An abject failure.

Highlight of the season: His transfer deadline day turtleneck.

Lowlight of the season: Being arrested for drunk driving the wrong way up a one-way Copenhagen street, thankfully he’s become so good at missing nobody got hurt.

Season trivia: An anagram of Nicklas Bendtner is ‘Blank incest nerd’.

Next season: Needs to grow up, set his sights lower and go somewhere he can play on a regular basis. He’s not a Champions League footballer, except in his head, and unless he smartens up he’ll waste the bit of talent he has.

Joel Campbell – 6/10

This was his second season out on loan and although he’s only scored twice the 20 year old has made an impressive 26 appearances in La Liga for Real Betis. He’s impressed, so much so that they want him back again next year, and it looks as if Arsenal are willing as they tie-up a more formal arrangement with the Andalusian side.

Highlight of the season: A rather splendid winning goal away from home at Deportivo.

Lowlight of the season: Probably had to deal with Dick Law somewhere along the way.

Season trivia: Has a massive tattoo of Paolo Wanchope across his shoulders but from one angle it looks like an aroused angel feeding ambrosia to a mermaid

Next season: Another season at Betis will ensure he picks up European citizenship, and should enable him to develop as a player. If he impresses, it opens the door for an Arsenal return.

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oh christ.came back from the tattooists feeling so shiny and unicorny,then i read that.fuck.


Where’s Carlos Vela? Probably the most successful of the lot on loan.


Quite a few gaps really.

Santos, Frimpong and Djourou (or was he included in Defence? Can’t quite remember – I know Chamakh was in our attack)


He left permanently if I recall correctly.


I thought he was permenently in spain – eventhough we might have some kind of buyback clause..


I don’t know how to tell you this… But

Robert McMillan

We sold him last summer dude!

A N Other

He has been sold not loaned out..


” An anagram of Nicklas Bendtner is ‘Blank incest nerd’. ” <— is possibly the best thing St. Nick has produced in his career thus far.


the best he did was that duet with arshavin, which a lot of people may have missed, but i appreciated it 🙂


Chuks Aneke is worth a mention!


I read that Bendtner was the lowest selling replica shirt in top flight football this season. Not one person in Italy bought his shirt. Poor guy – how about that for a confidence boost. No wonder he was out on the lash


Talksport went to Italy to buy one. 🙂
The answer from the salesman in the Juventus shop: “Are you sure?”


It was a fake call. Just Talkshite trying to be funny!


Seriously what the fuck is up with the whole Park debacle?

I’m actually hoping once Wenger retires he uncharacteristically launches an autobiography and has a chapter called ‘C’est quoi ce bordel que je pensais?’


I’ve always written him off as a cynical ploy to try and sell shirts/merchandise in South East Asia. Possibly the club saw Ji-Sung Park and how much he helped Manchester United’s brand exposure in South Korea and thought ‘we’d quite like some of that’. Fair enough if it had come off, but apparently he wasn’t actually that good. Of course, I’m only basing this on conjecture, not fact. Maybe they honestly just got a bad scouting tip and made a balls-up. Who knows?


It was the first time I bothered going out of my way to watch a youtube video of a player and I was expecting something special. The fact half his goals were against the UAE should have been a concern.

You live and you learn. I’ll just stick to listening to people that actually watch the leagues in question from now on.

Dick Swiveller

He was certainly doing alright considering how bad Monaco were (turns out he might have been better off staying there and taking some of their shiny money) and he looked like a half-decent player who just isn’t suited to the Premiership, we’re due a good striker import from France by now, right?


I think Cambell is the only glimmer of light and the rest…well enough said

Merlin's Panini

Ryo has just been unlucky with injuries. I think there could still be a special player in there. He just needs a bit of luck.


I think of Ryo too, …more than Cambell. I think he’s still young, and too fast to be kept away from first team for so long. We might just see more of him still. I love all the clips that I saw. I think he runs better with the ball, unlike some players we see being given chances. He might just turn out to be one of those intertaining to watch players. I shall wait and see. I don’t like Miralas since the day he wrecked the boy, needlessly. I hate that guy since that day. Injuries are certainly pulling… Read more »


I agree. I think we’d be mad to go with the “view to a permanent move” approach.
If he gets back to the fitness levels he had while he was at Bolton and improves his passing, the end result would be something like Walcott with a load of consistancy patches stuck on him.

He’s still young and early indications were that he’s going to be really bloody good. Certainly worth a full season loan playing (rather than on Wigan’s physio bench) before making any decision on his long-term future.

Eboue's Perfectly chiseled b a l l s



I think it is a bit unfair on Ryo, I have high hopes for him.


Want Ryo to make it at Arsenal.

Recreational Hugs

Down voted on my phone by accident… I actually agree!


Let’s see, he’s out injured for 4 month and then has his ankle poleaxed and this makes him a poor player who should be moved out. It’s a good job Wenger did not do that with another young player who spent a lot of time on the injury table. I remember loads of sites claiming we should off-load RVP in his early years.

I said waaaaaaaaaaaaaay back on Arseblog News that — and I knew people wouldn’t like it — that Japanese footballers really are nowhere near the level of the Premier League in terms of, well, everything really — mentality being one of the key factors, along with controlled aggression, confidence, adaptability, etc. Living out here and watching football; seeing it played in the parks, in 5-a-side, and at games, and watching the National team, it’s obvious, you really feel it And my comment was met with loads of thumbs down, but it hasn’t surprised me Ryo hasn’t done the biz yet.… Read more »


what about yoshida at southampton? he’s been one of their best players. and kagawa doesn’t look half bad. maybe you could make your point without generalising about all japanese footballers…

Zorro in the box

Keisuke Honda in the Bundesliga as well.

Junichi Inamota was a good player too. Don’t think there’s any nationality that can’t make it, it’s down to the players.

Merlin's Panini

Honda is in Russia at CSKA Moscow, not the Bundesliga.
There are a lot of Japanese players doing very well in the Bundesliga though: Makoto Hasebe, Shinji Okazaki, Yuki Otsu, Gotoku Sakai, Hajime Hosogai, Atsuto Uchida…
All these players are playing regularly in a league that is arguably as good if not stronger than the Premier League at the moment.


Hope is free, but the bloke hasn’t progressed much really from his arrival. Some of that is down to injuries and rotten luck, poor bloke, but still – would you rather see a prospect that’s actually progressing better and coming through end up neglected and told that his place in the squad has gone and he’s got to leave it to ryo?

[…] This time the midfielders, forwards and loanees. […]


Dont count Ryo out blogs, I feel that was very unfair of you.


“an aroused angel feeding ambrosia to a mermaid”

Seriously blogs, you’re wasted on the internet. How about a collection of Hemingway-esque short stories?

Mayor of the Woolwich

No talks of our own ‘Yaya Toure’ ?


I always thought Ryo was a lot younger. But he’s older than the Ox, and he’s got to compete with him and Serge Gnarbsourg, so maybe he will be off next season. Can’t see him pushing ahead of them

Sex Fabergé

Ryo still has the body of an emo teenager while the Ox already has the physique of a seasoned draft animal. Maybe another year or two and Ryo will develop the necessary muscle for the Premier League.


I don’t agree I’ve seen both of them and the Ox is shorter and not as physically imposing as people seem to think. Myiachi is still young (20) and has alot of good qualities so it would be worth giving him another season or two to improve. I’d say he’s no worse than Walcott was at this stage and we are only now getting good returns from him. People are more impatient with young players and expect everyone to be elite level straight away, look at Ronaldo he was just a show pony for the first 3-4 seasons and then… Read more »

“Wagyu cattle were sent as a gift to the Alpine state where they mated with the Laughing Cow.”

Laugh out loud.

Jim Jimminy

What im about to say is obvious but having been reminded of his season i just wanted to get it down on pixels… Niklas bendtner really is a joke. My phone doesn’t even know how to auto correct his name on its own.


Joel Campbell Arsenal return did you say?

Have to say, the trivia sections across all of the ‘Ratings of the season’ were funny!


‘Diaby is like a new signing’ better have one of the loaners than that,
chamahk bye
ashavin gudbye
bendtner r.i.p.
Santos stop there
frimpong come back for carling.
Ryo come back for carling cup.
Joel kudos to you.


What happened to Wellington Silva?


He got the boot.


Ryo is just another Alberto Mendez really, a punt by Wenger that won’t work out.

Campbell ‘might’ turn out to be good enough but surely he’d develop better being at Arsenal or getting a loan within the Prem? Or is it a work permit/dodgy passport job situation?

Merlin's Panini

He has to get a work permit or visa to play in England. He doesn’t need it in Spain so he is being loaned out in order for him to then be issued a European passport. I believe Ryo was given a special talent visa
ahead of him (or was it ahead of Wellington? I can’t remember) as you can only apply for one per year.

A N Other

Blogs is been too generous with Bredtner’s rating.


Arsenal has signed a lot of expensive crap. Its about time we bought some quality.


I’m a fan of Ryo because from what I’ve seen and read, he works his ass off in training and loves the club. Also, he is extremely humble so that’s a bonus.


Hahah, the thing about Brazilian football is that the Serie A league proper only lasts about 6 months. The rest of the year there are local state Championships, then national and continental cups. Brazil is a big place and smaller clubs can’t afford playing a national scale tournament. Simple as that 😛


Obviously not ryo deal.


Obviously not the ryo deal.


What about Benik Afobe?


Other anagram of Nicklas Bendtner:

Discernible k’nnt.


All Ryo fans should point fingers at Mirallas. …I mean, what was he trying to do to the boy that afternoon???


I really think that the best next move will be to get rid of all that we can on a free and anyone under 26 has a great sell-on clause in the contract that would make up for the loss of a transfer fee.


it’d be nice to see a piece on the youth too. the upcoming youngsters. those that have had a run out this season and have impressed. i remember in pre-season and in the capitol one cup, guys like Eisfeld and Gnabry looked impressive. for a few games we had Meade at LB who impressed. then we have Chambo who should hopefully improve and become a hard choice to leave out from the starting line up for next season. there’s also Ryo Miyaichi who impressed. hopefully he stays with us and improves. he’s a crowd favorite already. and he’s more of… Read more »

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