Things Michael Owen thinks are better than Mesut Ozil

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You might remember that a couple of weeks ago Michael Owen – former football and now full time dipshit for BT Sport – said that he thought Raheem Sterling was a better player than Mesut Ozil.

And hey, we’ve all said some stupid things in our time, but when we do most of us like to just let it lie. We certainly don’t double-down and repeat those ridiculous things, but Owen did just that, stating yet again just yesterday that Sterling was a better footballer than the German.

Shockingly though, it’s not just Sterling he thinks is better than Ozil. An insider found a sheet of paper in the bin at the BT studios and sent it to us. It’s a list of things that Michael Owen thinks are better than Mesut Ozil, he had it at the ready to back up his ludicrous guff, and it’s reproduced for you here.

Click to embiggen

michael_owen

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Wrighty's Gold Tooth
Wrighty's Gold Tooth

Definitely not music or films though

Highberry
Highberry

How about an article entitled things I think are better than Michael Owen ? 1)everything even irritating objects stuck inside my left nostril
Except John Terry and Samir Na$ri. They’re lower than a snake’s belly and dirtier than a penguin’s chuff.

bonbonbon
bonbonbon

Pure poetry

Mesut Aussie
Mesut Aussie

How the hell did they get up your left nostril you poor soul? Both of them?

Double98
Double98

“I think Ozil is a very good player but it’s ironic, we were talking about a crisis at Arsenal only a few months ago and they were struggling around fourth or fifth saying ‘are they going to get into the top 4?’ knocked out the Champions League, hanging on in the FA Cup.

“All of a sudden it looks like they are going to win the FA Cup now, looks like they are going to come second in the league and it will be a decent season for Arsenal, a very good season for Arsenal. It’s amazing how the game can change in the space of a month or so.”

Its not ironic at all you MOron – a few months ago we were in crisis and then something happened.
Mesut Fricking Ozil came back into the team….

Maybe ??????

It’s amazing how the game can change in the space of a month or so when a player not as good as Raheem Sterling gets back into the team.

Dodgerz
Dodgerz

Bloggs you are a mad man. Andrea Dossena? Where did that come from? You genius.

Vish024
Vish024

Not to dampen the joke or anything but Andrea is in fact a unisex name, it’s common for both boys and girls in Italy e.g. Andrea Pirlo.

sambo
sambo

Now why would you go and do a thing like that Vish…

Don Cazorleone
Don Cazorleone

Not to dampen the joke or anything, but let me just dampen the joke.

Az Ahmed
Az Ahmed

Hahahahahahaha bricks

Phil
Phil

You could probably add Andrea Pirlo to the list of players Owen thinks Sterling is better than.

Richie Growling
Richie Growling

Richie Growling

WengersNoseHair
WengersNoseHair

Shirley the joke is that Owen doesn’t know that?

deji
deji

ooooh vishy boy!!!….shoro niyen?

bounderboy
bounderboy

Hehe genius as always – some reference’s I don’t get – eg. Hands Free Car Kits? Or is just blogs on a trip? 🙂

James
James

“No aunts” at the picnic or “no cunts”?

Dylan
Dylan

I’m sure he wouldn’t enjoy said picnics if he wasn’t allowed in.

Zizou
Zizou

I am also a fan of hores.

AN other
AN other

I thought he would have all of his liverpool players in it for example
Sakho
Toure
Lovren
Moreno
Milavic
Balotteli
Or any player signed by Rodgers

Exiledgooner
Exiledgooner

Given how he pushed hard for a move away from Liverpool and then later joined their arch rivals, I can’t help but wonder why he persists with his Scouse bias. I’m pretty confident that most of them don’t reciprocate.

Chuck
Chuck

Having a scouse bias is very beneficial for a career in British sports media

bims lay
bims lay

thats because he is a twat….just like the picture says!

clockend_mum
clockend_mum

Ozil. Owen. One of them’s been nicking a living since 2013, and I think we all know which one.

Thierry Bergkamp
Thierry Bergkamp

You’re forgetting his Newcastle days

Paul
Paul

He scored a good goal for England and the rest was shitstory!

David C
David C

best comment! Also Owen’s voice is not an accent anyone should have to listen to.

Man Like Ozil
Man Like Ozil

Blogs, making good use of the Office Lens app?

DrabWilly
DrabWilly

‘Click to embiggen’? Embiggen? It’s a perfectly cromulent word to use I guess.

Exiledgooner
Exiledgooner

Questioning the cromulence of the word ’embiggen’? You, sir, are banned, along with your children and your children’s children.

Exiledgooner
Exiledgooner

For three months.

Exiledgooner
Exiledgooner

That would have worked better if my previous comment had actually posted. Bloody internets…

Dylan
Dylan

I think i like this version better

Nepaligooner
Nepaligooner

Owen goes a bit weak on the knees always.pls forgive him !

herman
herman

Fucking genius mate… love it.. and i begining to despise this Owen guy each time he open his foul yap. . .

keep it goonerish mate. .

Governing Dynamics
Governing Dynamics

I was wondering if he would have the opinion if we sign Sterling in the next transfer window. .

Brian Mendoza
Brian Mendoza

I heard that he thinks Phil Collins and Linford Christie are better than Ozil

Alex
Alex

It’s even the third time he said it as after the Liverpool game he tweeted he was repeating his thought (if im not mistaken). LOL

Clock-End Mike
Clock-End Mike

“Reqiuem for a Dream”? Perfect!

He’s probably watched it 100 times…

NCGooner
NCGooner

Is it a good thing that I don’t know about this “Requiem for a Dream” thing? Too bored (scared) to look up for it on the internets…. 🙂

Chuck
Chuck

Its a movie about drug addiction pretty intense

DB10**
DB10**

Dark..dont go there

Heroldgoon
Heroldgoon

Michael Owen has a fantasy of him and Raheem Sterling doing Shisha under a tree every night. He’s hoping this is the only way to get Sterling to agree to it. Peculiar i know, but Michael Owen doesn’t doesn’t care

richardanus
richardanus

It was Michael’s dream to play for Real Madrid. Where he plopped.

Walcott's left footed curl
Walcott's left footed curl

Having a picnic with your does suck though. Gotta give him that.

Deano

Thought he would have had the Real Madrid or Newcastle treatment room written down. He must have forgot them.

Fergie’s favourite plonk also

Deano

Bench^

Radu
Radu

I think Michael Owen is Mesut Ozil in disguise. Just think about. Not only are both of their initials M.O., but it would make sense for Mesut to want to divert attention from himself, and keep on playing as well as he has been these months. What can I say? Keep it up.

Le Jim
Le Jim

But Mesut’s not a twat.

Radu
Radu

Of course not, he’s just playing a part. All for the good of the team 😀

Arsene's zip
Arsene's zip

You make a good point.. I’ve never seen them in the same room.

Don Cazorleone
Don Cazorleone

I would hope that if they were, Ozil would dropkick him. All the while screaming “YaMesutYa”.

Murrray
Murrray

Thought he’d say Toure is better than Gabriel

Moko-gooner
Moko-gooner

I think Owen only aims at Arsenal when he pretents to know football, is because we react. It is going to be headlines and gooners will fluid it with comments. He cannot really criticize Pool and MANU since he is been there. For Chelski and Shitti well, it is boring when you call someone stupid if he or she is really stupid, isnt it. So recently when some stupid magazine or website or wannabe commentator critisize Arsenal or players, I just think “oh one more attention whore”

arsesicky
arsesicky

Exactly, one thing we arsenal fans are definitely guilty of is being easy to wind up. We’ve got one of the largest and most vocal online fan bases, and any article criticising our players is guaranteed to get hits, comments and advertising revenue. In the famous words of the internet, don’t feed the trolls.

GoonerN16

He really is stupid… extremely… Moronic even…

Ghana Gunner
Ghana Gunner

Haha.. Owen talk like a hungry horse

PauloDiGunnio
PauloDiGunnio

The man peaked at 17, downhill since then

laughingboy16
laughingboy16

I think BT Sports need to bring in random drug testing.

Mickö
Mickö

Would love to smack Owen clean up face with a 3 week old mackerel dripping with maggots then hold him down while my dog continually urinated over his head then trail him behind my car for 30 mile across a road covered in broken glass reversing a few times over him just for good measure

Don Cazorleone
Don Cazorleone

I would most definitely bop him one on the hooter also

LaLaLa
LaLaLa

Who can forget this, the boy’s a natural.. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uD-LjX_K9Cg

TommyGun
TommyGun

Love that. “This is no ordinary chopper” – talking about the helicopter right?

Xxxrob
Xxxrob

I think Owen was one of those babies discarded at the start of 300..

Chan
Chan

What’s worse than being a c*nt?

– Being a noisy c*nt, which is probably the worst type of c*nt

Don Cazorleone
Don Cazorleone

Ba dum tshh?

bims lay
bims lay

being a twat!…..worse than being a cunt imo

Brendan
Brendan

2/10

The Only Olivier is Giroud
The Only Olivier is Giroud

Vintage Blogs.

AFCVT
AFCVT

yes

Jules
Jules

FAT PETER ANDRE YOU’RE JUST A FAT PETER ANDRE

ken
ken

It’s sad how owen’s brain is on the wane so quickly in his early 40s just like his footballing career after 18!

ckZA
ckZA

Ozil is the kind of player that does a lot of small things damn good. And as the months roll by and this squad solidify’s itself I can only see him providing more and more of the non flamboyant Vorsprung durch Technik football which is his style.

Had he been criticized by a true legend I’d bat an eye lid. Ohwine is definitely nothing of the sort.

Until then I only pay attention to us vs chelski and you guessed it, stocking more beer. And rum. That Caribbean rum. That makes you smell all manly the next day.

Paul Gilmartin
Paul Gilmartin

Michael who?

Paul
Paul

Michael Cunt

Runkeball
Runkeball

Michael Slowin

dennisthemenace
dennisthemenace

no one has ever been paid so much to do so little as michael owen, just ask newcastle. that being said, requiem for a dream probably is better than ozil.

Gunnerblog's Lorry Driver
Gunnerblog's Lorry Driver
Savage
Savage

No Charlie Adams?

Brian
Brian

I think Bronn summed it up best…”there’s no cure for being a cunt”

Cannons Blazing
Cannons Blazing

Who wouldn’t want the old man-eating bears of Blogs let loose on this Owen twat??
A blunt cutlass chop his lips for good measure..

Heroldgoon
Heroldgoon

Maybe Sterling is putting him up to this. i mean he got liverpool to raise his wages by a staggering £70k and still told them to fuck off when it was placed on the table.

Bill
Bill

I particularly like the use of the word “dipshit”…

Fatgooner
Fatgooner

This is a boring topic. Everybody knows that Michael Owen is a charmless, not-too-bright, biased Liverpool fan who probably thinks that Robbie Savage is smarter than Stephen Hawking. The whole Rahim Steerling situation can be summed up in one sentence: A greedy fool who’s going to ruin his career.

I’m looking forward to the two Champions’ League ties tonight. Barca are through but will probably punish PSG with more brilliant football. But can Bayern come back from 3-1 down? I think they can: I’m going for a 2-0 win for the German side, which will see them just sneak through.

Shame we’re out – but that fantastic Monaco side was just too good for us.

Paul
Paul

You have to ruin it at the end Fats…!

Raiyan
Raiyan

I sincerely hope that calling Michael Owen a “former football” was intentional and not a typo. Because that made my day.

Yaya Binks
Yaya Binks

Isn’t it lovely to see Michaels mums handwriting is getting neater

Curtísimo
Curtísimo

Barnarnars!!!

batman's agent
batman's agent

Thank u Arseblog, u cheered me up a bit!! This ISIS terrorist groups beheaded my Ethiopian people( Zelalem’s country by birth, incase u want to relate) and I was really down this two days.

Jijo
Jijo

Give him 25000v electric shock and he will say a vibrator is better.

mach iii
mach iii

Michael Owen is a twat.

DialSquareGoon
DialSquareGoon