Friday, September 22, 2023

Arsenal lose game to Boreham Wood

Arsenal were left reeling after a 3-0 defeat to Boreham Wood in a pre-season fixture this afternoon.

In a game that does not augur well for the new campaign, a Gunners side packed with established talent like Kristopher da Graca, Aaron Eyoma, Josh da Silva, Ted Helix-Washington Jr and Clive Hindquarters struggled against the National League side.

They were behind after 10 minutes, and the score remained the same until late in the game when goals from Shaun Jeffers (adopted step-son and half-brother to former Arsenal striker Francis Jeffers), and Kenny Davis (cousin of sax supremo Kenny G) sealed the game for the home side.

It’s hardly the start we all wanted to a new pre-season and probably suggests that we’re utterly doomed for what lies ahead.

Unless things change really rapidly between now and the first game then clearly it’s curtains for the Arsenal this season.

We might as well all give up now. You can find a full report on the shocking events here.

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No mention for Sam Beasant in the Boreham Wood goal – grandson of Dave?


Is that true? Remember him with that curly hair…and we had the likes of Perry groves….
Come on ya so called goooners who you all remember….and not just club legends prove you goooner status here!!!! Anders limpar


Armoury Bischoff.

Anyone remember him ?

Ian Selley ???

David Hillier ???

Jimmy Carter ????

Eddie McGoldrick ???

Gus Ceaser ???

Justin Hoyte ???

Nelson Vivas ???

Shall I keep going ???

And by the way ” super super swede super Andre Limpar ” was total quality as good as anyone we’ve got today !!!


You have smashed that out the park..loving them names pal. David and Ray parlor pinching suitcase from the airport after a cup winners cup game looool


Limpars goal against Liverpool that chip from about our own goal line unreal


Of course Liverpool fans put it down to having Watson in goal and not back hand Bruce. Lol


It was hooper in goal that day not Watson


Is it sad that just last week I googled where Amaury Bischoff was? That signing was peak Wenger cliche; random unknown youngster whom no one had heard of and was also a diminutive attacking midfielder.

I also googled Samuel Galindo after hearing of Wellington’s sale.


For some reason I had hopes for the young Bolivian Galindo… its funn which young players you just randomly form an attachment to and start to hope they really make it


Anders limpar not Andre


Sorry predictive text of course it’s Anders and not Andre ( that’s not exactly a sweedish name is it ? Lol

I used to live watching the guy rip teams apart from the old North bank.

He was un catchable, I think quicker than Walcott or very close but definitely quicker running with a ball at his magical feet.


As a kid I won a comp and met all the players. Anders was sat on the table next to me ray parlor in front then wrighty cambell Merson the other side all laughing and joking with the other kids we waiting to see who we had on our table….Steve bold rocked up and needless to say he was a hoot. The only person there that was more dull than him was Brian Marwood.



Pick the best worse Arsenal team ??

See if your team can lose to this one ???????

Gk– Vince Bartram

Def — Santos lb
Squilacci cb
Stepanovs cb
Gus Cesarean rb

Mid —- Armoury Bischoff
John Jensen
Jermain Pennant

Att —– Francis Jeffery
Park Chu Young

See if you can ???

Good luck , it isn’t easy.


I would find it hard to name a team wort than that….but does any one remember ( excuse the spelling) quincie awosi awobi. He had mega fast feet but it never seemed to happen for him I think he ended up in Russia.


I played a pick up game in the park once with Jimmy Carter at the end of his career, I always gave him crap for being terrible, but damn he blew us all away and wasn’t trying!

NW Gooner

Andy Linighan


Steve marrow
Dav suker. What the fuck happened to him.

Remember we had David platt for a while


Morrow did score a league cup final winning goal so not really an unknown as for Davor Suker he was a top top international before we signed him so definitely not an unknown.


And as for David Platt are you kidding, how the hell is he an unknown ????

Your all missing the point , your meant to be naming players who were no where near to being a legend the players who played for Arsenal and were soon forgotten.

So try again and give me some
decent names.
Test your Arsenal knowledge, how well do you know Arsenal ???

Who can pick the best worst team ???


He scored the winning goal in an FA cup final. I was there. He’s a hero!!


Yeah it was Linighan in the league cup wasn’t it ?

If you was there why the hell didn’t you catch him lol

Well done mate a true gooner 4 life


We had a couple of shite keepers in Richard Wright and harper.


Not exactly an unknown, he was part a regular in the first team.

Brendan Rodgers' self-portrait

Shocking result. Almost as bad as losing the first leg of a Champions League qualifier to a team of part-timers…no, actually not nearly as bad when you think about it.


Suck it Venger


It’s Wenger !!!!

What the hell are you doing on an Arsenal forum ????



You need to relax fella. It’s called a joke. Poking fun at people who get upset online far to easily…


I don’t think he manages the under 21s, even if Henry won’t do it

Daft Aider

some of our best seasons have followed on from terrible pre-seasons,
plus Sanogo isn’t playing yet, thaaat’ll sort everything :p


He(Sanogo) will hit his now customary pre-season hattrick


J-comprende pas

Daft Aider

a double hat-trick followed by a damaged cruciate, then whilst he’s injured he’ll be hyped to be Messi no 2


How did our new striker perform?

Godfrey Twattschlock

Clive Hindquarters was shocking. Not worth the 200 million quid we bought him for from Pratts Bottom United.

stephen foot

what a fkin obvious headline and I take it this lot will be facing lens on Friday or Liverpool …. doesn’t take the wenger out mob to start shit stirring…. the bandwagon haslost it wheels, should we lose to Liverpool by the same score then maybe a few questions need to be asked.. for now get real and stop shit stirring


You ok?

Third Plebeian

Stephen’s foot planted firmly in mouth..


Arsenal 2-2 Liverpool 100%

I bet we don’t sign a too class striker, I have a feeling he will start playing Walcott up with olly.
Because we are so midfield heavy.

We need big hig just over a goal a game last season and only 28 get him on a 5 year…wenger spent 10m last season ….pay what you gotta pay and get the man that in my opinion will be our missing link to winning the prem.

Reply to this I wanna know your thoughts guys even if you think I’m talking bollox


You wouldn’t want to sign a too class striker. Nobody wants that. A striker with just enough class and no more for me thank you very much


I don’t want just enough mate. I pay through the nose for my ST and I want some return now. I want a goal mecheine. Our midfield can pick out passes that don’t even look possible we need end product. Ollie is not enough for me. I think his at best with his back to goal. He needs someone world class playing off him that knows where the goal is.


Whoever thumbs down that either knows nothing about arsenal or football in general.


Daft Aider

I like beans……


Gloom! Doom!


Clive Hindquarters is a huge talent. Regards, Sir Mix-A-Lot


This is not me!


It can only get worser Lmfao


Hindquarters??? Really??? Come on blogs, stop making up these names ?


Just wanna know if Vlad played well.

broken red army

wake up you lose 3 nil, no one plays well 😀


We need to splash some cash Now!!!
on Stelio Kontos!

He can play striker and CB!
What the fuck is wrong with Wagner.


I like your work. Maybe not in 6 hours when I still have the song in my head


OK. Let’s at least buy someone with three syllables in their first name and two in their last. It will make for a terrifying chant.

Until then, we have Mohamed!
Mohamed Elneny!

Olivier Giroud!

Santi Cazorla!

Mezut Ozil!


Really weird post


Feel a little patronized


Has no bearing on the next season, but our under 21s do seem slightly shit, which is worrying


Wagner out!


lol, it was the u21’s


Helix-washington makes my blood boil!

Evang. Femi

I still prefer losing to this team than losing to Barca or Bayern.


No worries. You can have both.

someone's something

After Helix-Washington Jr and Hinquarters I was expecting McCringelberry so be named.

Cape Town Gooner

Wenger just doesn’t have the ambition to go for established world class talents like McCringleberry…


Another game that Giroud fails to score… Joke


Its the u 21s

Third Plebeian



Its the under 21’s …..

Third Plebeian


Never mind.

Me So Hornsey

Thierry!!! Come back!!




Wenger needs to spend spend spend!!! Anyone now! Board is a disgrace. NO ambition. They don’t want to win even if it means even more money to their pockets. Where’s the greed?


So has anyone played the new Doom?


I thought this was a joke….Well shit……..

Vincent Kompany's Forehead/Jamie Vardinho

I almost googled Clive Hindquarters thinking that was a player ha


Hang on franny jaffers what?????
Please explain my heads spinning…is he banging his own mother or what?

Santa Claus


Andy Mack

If they don’t raise their game soon we’ll have to play the second team instead.
I hear that Cazorla kid is quite special!


Anybody else getting the ‘naughty date – women who always say yes’ advert or is it just me?

Mesut O'neill

Mine are “single Arab women” despite the fact I have never googled that in my life.


Yes I get that too. It’s Brazilian women at the moment.

Dodgy site this is 😉


Omg muset o’neil why are you googling Muslim woman for that’s a bit heavy pal…then again mins advertising swimming lessons with Michael Barrimore


Lame lame boring pussy arsenal fans.


It’s a joke you lot need to lighten up…thumbs down for swimming lessons with Barrimore is funny as fuck, come on….his prep talk…”if I take my finger out your arse you’ll sink!!!!


If you rotate DOOM 180 degrees it spells WOOD. We should have seen this coming.



Godfrey Twattschlock



And he didn’t even need to duck.


No it doesn’t! It actually spell’s ” WOO Backwards D ” and backwards ” D’s ” are nothing to get excited about!


So no Wooing! Unless its aimed at Higuain…


AKA ‘Backwards D’

Third Plebeian

They say if you write the alphabet backwards it’s a message from Satan.


its a good thing we’re not going up against the alphabet then. No one needs that sort of trouble.


The naughty woman that always says yes it frannys mum


Fact of the matter is, we need David Dean back at the club….he makes things happen…best buyer and salesman we ever had…big big loss

Giroud's bulge

Who is David Dean?

Oh, you mean Dien. Come back when you’ve given up on your basketball chicken lad.




Yes that’s the one, chicken boy, love your user name BTW mate. Very very manly

Godfrey Twattschlock

So Wenger finally splashes out on a WCS in the form of Clive Hindquarters and he gives us this lacklustre performance? The worst 200 million spent EVER!



Who would you want instead of wenger then mate,


There is no one available

Tell me your not thinking big Roy

Godfrey Twattschlock

Allardyce is an obvious choice but with him taking the England job we missed the boat on that Big Sam.


Big Sam lol. I was told pep was coming to us for sure then man city get him. I think stick with what we know. Until Dennis takes the rains off wenger in a few years



If you could have any experience arsenal player as manager who would it be.


Ex* not experience

Godfrey Twattschlock

Pep who?

Having missed out on Big Sam there is still Pulis. Shit hair but cool cap and allegedly he likes to shower with the boys after a game which could be good for morale. Let’s have him!


I got told he had a massive ginger afro under that cap…. but he can’t like a shower with the boys more than wenger…let’s face it arsen looks like he could give uncle Jimmy a run for his money


Ya boring pricks


It’s clear there are problems there. As Tim stillman wrote not long ago the squad was unbalanced with no clear objectives as to what the plan for the season was. It’s as though we just hope every year we won’t get injuries. That after major tournaments we can survive without our major players or account for them being mentally and physically drained. Sanchez last year was just embarrassing. Do you think the players don’t look at that? I don’t get why some fans are so scared of change. he can’t go on forever. Look at tuchel at dortmund. Things can… Read more »

Andy Mack

Didn’t you say the same last summer, or was it one of the summers before?


You make fair points but on the up side. Our core will be the same our boss is the same. Pep ain’t gonna know what’s hit him come the Xmas fixtures and same for the chealscum boss, I hope if nothing else this works to our advantage.

Down with this sort of thing.

ffs .! i hate borham fuckin wood!


Kante has just signed for Chelsea £30 million.

Him or Cocquelin ????

I bet I know your answer lol


LCFC will fall apart now…Jamie will be kicking himself lol


Whoever thumbs down me then tell me your reasons. Are you telling me they will finish above role 6th next year they will fall apart now don’t get me wrong if we had to lose it to anyone it would have been them. But that shitcu#t vardy should have ripped our hand off in June


hey blogs,
this kenny davis kenny g thing is a joke right?? just dont get it.
appreciate your work.

He's got no hair but we don't care...

Almost as funny as our chances of signing Mahrez…


Yes we are signing mahrez….mahrez Khan….wenger says his an Asian messi. His 9 hurds cows for a living


Foken ell yo anyone’s to blame is Wenger and his pony salary policy which makes things don’t go our ways. Look at how manure pay their best players. It’s over 250k there ffs now look at our turfs. I say the likes of Özil and Alexis are below 200k even. How can that attract top top players Wenger you fake ass coach. Bleedy ell.

Third Plebeian

“Bleedy ell”

I’m crying.

Damien Joyce

I wonder if Shaun Jeffers was the “fox in the box” we needed all along!


walcott, invisible as usual


Glenn Helder Christopher Wreh

David kushner

Arsenal will be lucky to win a game of kick the can this season. With that said they will some how limp into the knockout stage of the Champions League before bowing out to one of the perennial favorites. and when everything is said and done Wenger and the boys will have their coveted fourth place trophy and all is right with the world.


Yes, we must get away from FA cups and improving our position to 2nd above all of those predicted to do better than us.


does anyone know what kind of team we’ll be playing for the lens game?


Well what do you expect when you leave Chris Twatit on the bench!??
Get out whilst you can Chris!


With bids of 40 to 50 mill going in for centre backs I reckon we could do a lot worse than Jonny Evans for 12 to 15 mill. Better than mert and Gabriel , seems to have found his form again, plenty of big game experience plus fergie rated him very highly.

Hleb's dancing feet

Of course this result means nothing in the larger scheme of things. Our young guns should look to step it up though. Tbh all I care about is Arsene bolstering what needs bolstering. Even though there is time to get things done, past events make it clear that Arsene can surprise us all and that can be good or very groundhog dayish.


You get a thumb up for your name. Hleb was a great player. The man with skinny legs and tiny shin pads. Seem to look like he was always going to fall over but got past everyone


I just watched Higuaín’s 38 goals. Fucking hell he is mustard!
He will go for 80m plus, so how bout selling Theo/Ox/Campbell and get him in??
Just dreaming…


It won’t happen tho mate, dreams don’t come true @arsenal since what 04?


What was the proudest moment to be an araenal fan..

Going the whole season unbeaten or…
Beating Liverpool to win the league.


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