Arsenal’s head groundsman announces departure from club

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Arsenal’s head groundsman, Reece Watson, has announced his intention to depart the club after more than a decade.

In a statement via his Instagram account, he said:

After 13 years at the club, I have decided to move on to the next chapter. I will leave my position in February to start a new and innovative company which will approach things differently and I’m confident will have a great impact on our industry.

I would like to thank Arsenal FC for the amazing opportunities they have provided me, for which I will be forever grateful. I leave behind a fantastic team and indeed some of my closest friends, all of whom have had such a positive influence on my life.

The playing surface at the Emirates is considered one of the best in Europe, and Watson follows former colleague Paul Burgess who left London to become head groundsman at Real Madrid some years ago.

Hopefully he’ll have success in his new venture, and no doubt the many friends he’s made at Arsenal down the years will ensure he never feels alawn. Leaving a job you’ve been at many years is often a turf decision to make, but he must have thought ‘Sod it, I always seed I was going to give this thing a try’, so best of luck to him.

They say life’s a pitch and then you rye, but we’re sure he’s got a well manicured future ahead of him.

#notevensorry

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Peter
Peter

Tough to squeeze so many grass jokes in. Well blade.

Pedant
Pedant

Jokes were a bit weedy.

Good luck to him in the future, great playing surface year after year.

Bernie Brown
Bernie Brown

They should sack him (or at least put him on gardening leave)

Russ
Russ

I nearly soiled myself reading those…

yen
yen

Let´s hope the grass will be as green for him on the other side.

Damo Dinkum
Damo Dinkum

I just hope he gets the celery his hard work deserves

Theo the friendly ghost
Theo the friendly ghost

Best one so far! I’m sure he can fescue plenty more bad pitches in his career.

Tapps
Tapps

We should have been garden against this situation occurring.

Rambling Pete
Rambling Pete

Many people underestimate the importance of a good surface. You wouldn’t play lawn bowls on a mud heap so football’s late acknowledgement of the benefits of a good pitch was always something of a surprise. I remember the ploughed fields of the 70s and 80s where it looked more more like the players were being sent out to re-enact the Second Battle of Ypres than play a game of football. I remember saying to my chum Gibson Gibson, whose parents thought they were very funny people but caused him all manner of strife down the years, that if you were a professional footballer being asked to perform on that kind of surface it would be tantamount to a surgeon being handed a rusty shears and a blunt box cutter as he attempted to remove a patient’s appendix. Not only would you find it hard to make the incision the chances of infection would be much greater, and let me tell you that’s something I know all about having witnessed the aforementioned Gibson suffer at the hands of a back street quack when he’d been taken a few pellets in the arse after fleeing from the house of a man whose wife he was having a bit of a fling with. One of then went right down his chocolate canal and of course he couldn’t go to a real hospital and when the man fished it out with a small dirty spoon the secondary infection nearly killed him. He spent three weeks sweating and reciting poems he claimed were the lost works of Samuel Taylor Coleridge but were in actual fact gibberish. He recovered fully in time but always claimed to be able to smell gunpowder every time he farted.

Pedant
Pedant

Brilliant as ever.

How do you get that done in 20 minutes?

Pakgooner
Pakgooner

I spat my coffee out in the computer lab when I read “went right down his chocolate canal”. Rambling Pete is the best

David C
David C

Grassias, amigo!

A Different George
A Different George

I think I smell gunpowder whenever I see a post from Pete.

GoonerN16
GoonerN16

@ramblig pete. So glad Gibson survived the arsenal canal trauma. I hope he farts infrequently.

Russ
Russ

All sounds a bit seedy to me

Gooneron
Gooneron

At least he leaves the grass as green as it gets

Chrispy
Chrispy

I heard he wasn’t well liked at the club. Some say he was a bit of a grass.

Crash Fistfight
Crash Fistfight

I wonder if he’s getting a betting salary in his new job. Good for him if so. Mind you, you know what they say: mow money, mow problems.

DB’s first touch
DB’s first touch

Sounds like this Watson fella is chasing more greenbacks…his move may yet see us get the rub of the green if we get someone better as his replacement

Kevinm8128
Kevinm8128

There’s been a lot of change at the club lately, but this departure could leave us feeling particularly for-lawn.

Georgeycharles
Georgeycharles

Bad news – a real pain in the grass

Georgeycharles
Georgeycharles

At least he’s not joining Manchester Seedy

Kevinm8128
Kevinm8128

I’ve heard he’s joining Grasshoppers

Man Manny
Man Manny

He may be gone to pastures new
But his roots remain here.

Matt Shelton
Matt Shelton

time for a fresh roll in life

Gudang Bedil
Gudang Bedil

Some dirty jokes we got here!

Tas_Gunner
Tas_Gunner

So that’s the “Crucial behind the scenes man”….
Cheers #DailyExpress

Ringoxiii
Ringoxiii

I think these jokes are starting to peater out…

Francesc
Francesc

That grass always seemed softer and smoother than my girlfriend’s skin

Canuck Gunner
Canuck Gunner

Typical Arsenal, letting someone run down their contract and letting them go for free. Who next – the ball inflator? When will it end?
(No, I’m not being serious).

David C
David C

haha, that’s great!

Canuck Gunner, where you from? I’m from Toronto. Good year for the Leafs too 🙂

Canuck Gunner
Canuck Gunner

I’m on the west coast. Grew up in Vancouver but now live in Victoria. So have a rather strong animosity to the Leafs as a result of being a Canuck supporter in my youth. But no longer have the passion for hockey.

Mpls
Mpls

The club had better thatch a plan quickly for his replacement. I hope Emery gets a chance to overseed the selections.