Sunday, August 7, 2022

Gabriel finds his tooth 🦷 ✨

Toothless. It’s a barb Arsenal have had to deal with all season.

Yesterday, Gabriel Magalhaes took it to another level.

In the aftermath of our 2-0 win over Brighton, several journalists spotted our Brazilian centre-back scouring the Emirates turf for something very small. He was soon joined by members of the backroom staff in his treasure hunt but eventually gave up.

It turns out the 23-year-old had lost a tooth while the players were saying their farewells to David Luiz on the pitch.

We’d envisaged Steve Morrow-levels of tomfoolery but it looks as those someone, much to the amusement of Willian and Thomas Partey, caught him in the mouth with a stray arm.

The good news is that the tooth has been found.

Given he has the shiniest incisors in all of north London, we’re hardly surprised. The player took to Instagram later in the evening to provide an update.

Gabriel isn’t the first Arsenal player to misplace his teeth. Paul Merson and Mikel Arteta, who also found yesterday’s incident very amusing, both suffered in the line of duty.

Paul Merson celebrates his man-of-the-match award after Arsenal win the 1993 League Cup final.
Arteta lost his teeth in a league clash with Hull City in 2014

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Would have thought it quite easy to find under some ultraviolet light.

Arsene's Zip

Something something toothless performance something.

Give youth a chance

Something about biting satire

Murphy was an Arsenal Fan

Nobody can now claim that our defence is toothless.

Cultured Determination

Our defence can now choose to be toothless.


Should have called in a canine detection unit…

I’ll get my coat.


Good to see they got to the root of the problem

Hulahoops Baptista

I was hoping it remain lost, sprout and grow into a backup left back during the off season.


On a serious note: has Gabriel been a success this season? He started well but we’ve seen a few dodgy performance too.

What should our centre-back pairing be next season?

Martin R

Let’s see how Saliba fits in before we come to any decision. However with Gabriel, Mari, Holding and Chambers, we are as strong as we have been in that area for a long time

Giuseppe Hovno

yeah we do not have any “disaster” defenders like we used to. there is none of the current set who you feel might explode / implode for no reason at any time. that alone is a huge relief. sure, they might have some flaws and I am sure they will make some errors and they’re not necessarily the very best, but they feel very reliable compared to Luiz/Mustafi – who were v good players most of the time but then had mad brain farts at inopportune moments.

Daz Pants

I agree wholeheartedly with what you and Martin R have said. I think Mari is the one I have slightly less faith in, but seeing as Arteta seems to put a sinificant degree of importance on having a left footed left CB, I think he will feature whenever Gabriel does not play.

Nacho de Montreal is tasty

Yes, everything is going well for us in the best possible world.

A Different George

I am not advocating that we keep David Luiz (and certainly not that we get Mustafi back). But we have to recognize that the “safer” centre halves we have now also means we have lost something. For example, Luiz’s range of passing was sorely missing against Villareal (worsened because Xhaka was also absent). If we mean to contend, then our centre halfs have to be good on the ball, and mobile enough to play a high line and still able to recover (at least, usually) against a counter. A player like Van Dijk might be one in a million, but… Read more »

A Different George

I have to disagree. I have hopes for Gabriel, because he is very young for a centre half and has both the pace and the physical strength to help compensate for his often-poor positioning and technical errors–and he can, hopefully, get better at those. Holding is not ever going to be good enough to play regularly in a contending side. He regularly misjudges high balls, lets an attacker get wrong side of him, and doesn’t have the pace to play a high line. In other words, could be more valuable at a club that bunkers in, but not at one… Read more »


I think so, very good 1v1 tackler. Looks solid and will improve now he’s adapting to the league. It’s nice to have defenders who can actually defend

Man Manny

We keep talking about adapting for our players.
Ruben Diaz arrived in the summer and is the player of the season!


apples : oranges

Gabriel: €27M, incl. bonuses.
Dias: €68M, Could be as high as €71.6M with bonuses.

No, money doesn’t equal quality, but that much of a difference (nearly 3x) tells you about the demand for the player’s qualities.

Yes, I’d love it if we’d have plunked down for Dias, and that kind of investment in other areas as well.

This comparison is just a reminder that the club doesn’t have, or hasn’t spent Man City money.

I think Gabriel is a solid find and is going to be quite big for us.

Spanish Gooner

Absolute rubbish that he’s player fo the season by the way. It’s just journalists trying to be contrarian and intellectual – it’s the same nonsense that saw Nedved win the Ballon d’or over Thierry


Not sure. Generally speaking, I’m happy with Gabriel and Mari as LCB options. Gabriel looks great when it comes „defensive stuff” – headers, tackles, interceptions. Good pace as well. He seems to lack in concentration, communication and passing a bit. Mari tends to add element of calmness to defense, is great positionally and good passer of the ball as well. I’m more worried about RCB position. With Luiz gone, we only got Holding (+ Saliba). I know he had a great end to the season, yet to me, I’m not sold on Holding as a starter if we’re to aim… Read more »


Holding had a great season. Arguably our best central defender. Chambers is another option and he’s obviously doing really well at RB. We also have Mavrapanos who had a cracking season at Stuttgart. We really don’t need to be worrying about CBs (for once). In fact we still probably need to sell one of the RCBs as 4 for one position is too many. 5 in total is all we need without Euro football (and Tierney can play if desperate). Considering Gabriel just had his first season in the EPL, I’m pretty chuffed with his quality. It’s great to not… Read more »


I agree and i would add…
Its great not having to worry about CB’s (for once)

Giuseppe Hovno

the only thing I could really add to that is that it’s great not having to worry about CB’s (for once)

Heavenly Chapecoense

I was happy to hear that Mavropanos had a cracking season but you also said Holding had a great season.

A Different George

Go back and watch our matches when you are not caught up in the moment. Concentrate on Holding. He has great spirit, great determination. He also is consistently beaten in the air, including by smaller players, and he is beaten for pace by many attackers. This means that it is more difficult for our right fullback to attack, because if Holding has to come out to defend the flank, he can too easily be rounded. It means that when he is playing high–as he must in a contending team–he backs off and allows the opposition to drive into dangerous areas.… Read more »


Didn’t say he was perfect, I said he had a very good season, and he did. As I said we really need to sell one of our RCBs and just a couple days ago I suggested that should probably be holding. Chambers can play RB, which gives him the edge, mavrapanos is really mobile and impressed with the ball at his feet this season, Saliba has clearly the highest upside of all of them and is pacey and good on the ball. the reason I think holding is because it’s a sell high moment and he is probably the slowest… Read more »


We just need that backup left back. Mavropanos and Saliba will be fine, so will Chambers and AMN.

Thierry Bergkamp (non negotiable)

I like him. He’s young and will improve once he’s fully adapted to the league, is fluent in English and has a steady partnership.
I think he’ll be our best defender since Kolo/Sol, hopefully Saliba too

Gus Caesar

Yeah, he’s brought real bite to our defence.

8th-the new normal is not normal

He is a good asset for us. Lille did not miss him though. They beat PSG to be champions. It tells us we’re still not close to the ceiling of player development. We’ve been good but there is better. Remember Monaco when they developed Mbappe, Martial and almost 10 others? Saka and ESR after Wilshere, it has been too long.

Spanish Gooner

Interstingly enough both teams were built by the same guy: Luis Campos was the director of football at Monaco 2013-2016, then at Lille from 2017-2020. I appreciate Edu is probably going nowhere, but it I owned Arsenal I’d bring him in tomorrow, especially now he’s out of contract.

Dave Cee

Ok fats, I will say he has been inconsistent but covid affected. But he has shown lots of potential and the headed goal vs Sparta was world class

Gutbukkit Deffrolla

You trying playing football with a loose tooth!!!

Eric Blair

Fangs for the story, very incisive. I am very enamoured with our Brazilian centre back. I hope Mikel gets to the root of who did this, it would be a crowning achievement.


They just had to switch off all the lights.

And would had sparkled.


Empaths should avoid reading this


Willian showed more emotion in that clip mocking Gabriel than we’ve seen from him all season, oof

That was Willian? I thought that was Nelson. Guess my eyes have become too accustomed to HD content. If I had a pound for every pixel in that clip. I’d be broke.

Looks like it was probably Mari or Auba that whacked Gabi’s chomper.

Public Elneny

The more I watch Gabriel play, the more I become enamelled with him

Daz Pants

You win!

Glenn Helder's Perm


Del Thomas

I heard they found it at tooth thirty this morning

Gutbukkit Deffrolla

Yes, it was definitely toof hurty


While we will miss Luiz’s incisive chips, Gabriel has surely earned the plaque for defender of the year (leaving a good impression having scored a brace of goals too). Some say his brush with Walcott that got him sent off in the Southampton game tarred his reputation, but I am confident he can bridge the cavity in our central defence if we retain him.

Daz Pants

Job beckons – headline writer for the Sun!

Heavenly Chapecoense

Yeah Gunners Yeah.

Gutbukkit Deffrolla

By gum, that was clever.

Salibaba & the Forty Thieves



Did he want to find the tooth so he could put it under his pillow for the fairies!

Nainsley Aitland Miles

A shiny 50p coin from Kroenke.


What if our earlier part of the season was crap? 6 points from top 4! 2 wins/1draw put us there, arrrgh.

I love tomas rosicky

Such a toothless article this

Medium Mozart

Hope this won’t dentist confidence.


Wait, so you can just stick your teeth back in?


Yeah, I thought it’s quite serious, but it seems like everyone is treating it as a funny incident!

All of the best puns have already been taken and that’s the tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth.


… so help me Bergkamp


Tooth to be told I am glad he found it.


Based on where they were looking for the tooth, it may have been an elaborate performance art piece to signal to Josh Kroenke that the midfield needs some work done.

That the CM position needs FILLING.

That we couldn’t find our way, having been KNOCKED OUT of Europe.

Or maybe he was saying something along the lines of: “Bite me, you capitalist vampire.”

Or that there was a hole in his mouth now – like Josh and his dad are assholes.


I knew our team had lost a bit of our bite this season


Maybe Gunnerblog can give him some tips on the state-of-the-art in tooth replacement

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