Transfer round-up: Nelson, Lacazette, Aubameyang, Odegaard, Torreira

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17 days of the transfer window left. Tick tock, Arsenal. Tick. Bloody. Tock.

Here’s some guff from the papers*…

[*not everything is from the papers]

Reiss Nelson

Palace are still sniffing around Reiss who made a surprise appearance in Friday’s opening game of the season. Most of the stories suggest Patrick Vieira wants the player on loan and Arsenal will offer the 21-year-old a new contract before he sets off for the year.

Alex Lacazette & Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang

Absent from Friday’s defeat to Brentford, the duo, who’ve featured throughout pre-season, are now the subject of some pretty outragious rumours. The most ridiculous comes from Catalan publication Sport who suggest both strikers are on Barcelona’s radar. This is the same club who are so broke they can’t even register guys they’ve already signed! As they haven’t got any money, they’re offering us players in exchange; Coutinho’s name has been mentioned. It’s so ridiculous that I’m dying inside just writing this.

Martin Odegaard

All the signs are that negotiations between Arsenal and Real Madrid are progressing and the Norwegian midfielder could rejoin this week. The only thing up for debate is whether the Gunners pay now or loan the 22-year-old for the year with a first right to buy next summer. It definitely feels like the latter would be more preferable.

Lautaro Martinez

“Go big or go home” seems to be Tuttosport’s attitude. They still think that Arsenal could sign Lautaro Martinez from Inter Milan but first Arsenal will sack Mikel Arteta and install his former Inter boss Antonio Conte. While I’m sure that scenario probably excites a lot of you, let’s be honest, the chances of it playing out inside two weeks are fanciful. You’d be better off placing a fiver on Arteta being voted the Premier League’s Manager of the Month.

Lucas Torreira

We’re just sticking his name in here in case any European clubs are reading. He’s available lads, please contact Mr. Edu Gaspar with your offers. You’ll have to prise him away from Alton Towers but he still plays football, promise.

Probably not really worthy of the poo-o-meter given it’s not a rumour.

Joe Willock

He’s still listed as an Arsenal player on the club’s website, so perhaps we bought him back from Newcastle already? Probably for £30 million. FFS.

Update – he’s been de-listed. Boo.

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Daveo

That Willock lad looks über exciting! Didn’t he just break the great Alan Shearer’s consecutive game goal scoring recrod? Fast, athletic, goal scorer, even an Arsenal fan I think. Get in son! Welcome aboard. happiest I’ve been about a new transfer in years.

truj

Feeling sad

Daveo

Wanna watch Requiem for a dream?

Sachin

Don’t even joke about it.

Fun fact: Arsenal in the late Wenger years had the theme from Requiem play in the stadium before the match. I’ve always blamed 75% of our failings on that track.

Cultured Determination

We sold willock because wow.,xha-fuxing-ka is so,much better than him. Capitan jack snail both in feet and mind played breath-taking football. Rumour has it we’re still rounding up the total,number of corpses of fans whose breath a mansged,to snuff out with his shiet

Daveo
Sagebrush

This Romano character smokes weed I think, he is excited by depressing news,. Xhaka for a new contract? Please people, what does he add to the squad?

Snagger

A player that the other team target according to Norgaard of Brentford. So he has a good Euros where he really didn’t come up against a pressing team and only Roma came in for him(Seria a equivalent to West Ham) and gave the poor mouth but are able to find 40 mil for Abraham. Then is rewarded with a pay rise, new contract and to top it off the captaincy. I was hoping it was a bargaining tool but raise your cupped hand too your ear tell everyone to go off and procreate, move over James May there is a… Read more »

Sachin

Let it go. The fans need to hate on someone. They expect Xhaka to play like Mbappe.

Snagger

I don’t hate Xhaka but should be a squad player at best not the captain especially after his antics. Redemption doesn’t make you quicker, smarter or better. All 3 qualities we need in the middle of the pitch. A mid table team came in for a mid table player after we finished mid table need I say more.

Omash

U are so full of spurs

Sachin

No. I think we got you right the first time around.

Snagger

Not hate him , just don’t rate him.

Sagebrush

Exactly. And managers know he is the weakest link, they want him in the team when they play arsenal, though they make it as if he is a difficult opponent, making fools of us. I remember Jurgen Klopp, prior to us taking a drubbing, saying he is worried because Xhaka can shoot from anywhere, mocking us. Shoot he does but waywardly.

Torterrier

The thought of Xhaka being a first team player for three more years really is putting me off watching Arsenal, I don’t know if I can hack it mentally or physically. Wake me up when this nightmare is over.

Der32

It’s not just you mate.

Daveo

It’s like they’re trying to put up off arsenal right now, it’s just bad decision after bad decision.

Paul

Maybe it’s so we don’t care when they move it to New York?

assistantref

Why on earth would Conte come to Arsenal? This is the guy who let his job at Inter after winning the title because they weren’t backing him to win a second one, and who has famously refused jobs in the past because he didn’t think the conditions were in place to be immediately successful. Arsenal is surely the last club in the world that someone like that is going to be interested in coaching.

truj

So you don’t Counte with him?

Martin R

As he is clearly not coming to Arsenal a totally irrelevant comment.

DPK

You didn’t even read the article you are commenting on did you Martin ? 😂😂

Martin R

Yes I did and I agree with the comment that he will not be coming. Did you read it?

DPK

You agree with the comment that you called totally irrelevant. Gotcha Captain Illogical 👍

Paul

I couldn’t read it as all the poos were in the way. 🙂

Twatsloch

He gave us his best pun and look what you did to it.

Omash

Conte would laugh at the offer of coming to AFC. Why would he come? Is he a serial loser?

Qwaliteee

This is all too true.

Yet another reason for those who still back Kroenke to have a word with themselves….

arseblog

I’d love to know who you think all these Kroenke backers are? At what point have you seen any substantial amount of people on here, or anywhere else for that matter, declare themselves fans of Stan and Josh?!

assistantref

If such people did exist, we could call them….the Stan stans?

Jackie

Here’s hoping that there’s some truth to the Auba – Coutinho swap. Slim, but I hope it happens.

Also hoping we can loan Odegaard first, if at all we must acquire him, with much of that money directed towards a striker and a RB.

Hoping…

NB@nb.com

Oh boy. Even if you buy into the myth that Auba has suddenly lost it, Coutinho wouldn’t solve any of our problems.

Sachin

I’ll take Pedri instead and throw in a Willian for free, there you go Laporte.

Pau

I’ll pretend you probably meant Laca, at least.

Andrew

Are you kidding me? Countinho is the last fucking player we should even be considering. Injury prone, finished as a top player, on high wages. That would be an absolutely abominable signing. Maybe we’ll get a deal though because of that Kia connection……absolutely mental.

Der32

Coutinho and Willian pulling the strings in our final third, sounds like a dream come true!

Twatsloch

A dream come true for our opponents.

TeeCee

Sounds like the sort of dream you get if you eat too much cheese before going to bed.

Bo Dacious

Why is Willian still here?

Sachin

You know Willian didn’t play on Friday and we were still hopeless. As fans we need to focus our frustrations better.

Paul

He put the team off in the dressing room.

Sachin

Ha! Maybe it something he ate?

Qwaliteee

Because Arteta signed him on a three year deal.

Only 23 months to go…….😔

Riku

My mate a city fan said he would have pC at city before they bought jack Greilish , and my Liverpool friend would like him back at Anfield. So I dunno why we all don’ t like PC , he had a good loan spell at Bayern Munich , it was widely reported …

Nic

great post, made me laugh. and this on a Sunday evening

MrT

Really Great Post.. After a long time we could see your frustration too 👍

Partey gonna shoot

Looks like we are gonna loss Laca for free or sell him in the winter (in case we get a replacement) like Sanchez.
CAM looks sorted, RB is the most urgent position for me where we need reinforcements where surprisingly we are not linked to anyone!

Brian

Totally agree! I always thought that if we got a Tierney level right back and a new midfielder I be happy, but it looks surprisingly unlikely. There really haven,t been any links. I guess we couldn’t move 2 right backs to make room, and that was always the prerequisite. Oodegaard is the midfield upgrade i wanted, but not enough to give me any confidence for the team overall. Next year we’ll be looking for a right back and a striker, and probably only get one – which seems to be the KSE way.

Sachin

No RB is bringing creativity – none we can afford TBH – so I’d stick with what we have if we get in a good CAM. We need this team to have some imagination and leadership desperately.

Does Bruno Fernandes have a younger brother?

Paul

We’d get his older one. 🙁

Virginia Gooner

Give Arsenals entire transfer record over the past decade a massive pile of shit. Another summer wasted. If Odegaard is the main target he should have been in. Madrid are in a sticky situation with their debt, make an offer and sign him. This is another Partey situation where it takes all summer when all they had to do is pay the release clause and he would have been an Arsenal player a month before he actually was. Instead let’s spend all window being indecisive and then panic on deadline day. I’m going to petition Arsenal to change our name… Read more »

Sachin

Yep. We are at the moment a bottom feeding club. I think when the slimeball execs from all the top clubs meet for cocktails, Vinai’s the one they throw peanut shells at.

AAitien

RM has no debt worth being called that, only €46M. They are financing a rebuild of the Bernabeu and they have to rebuild a team but it doesn’t mean than Odegaard is leaving. Ancelotti may want to keep him. And leaving for what? A team aiming to compete for finishing 8?

BidOnLard

Nothing on the gazillion not-so-right backs? Boo

Hakuna Matata

Ive watched 2day’s games n I must admit with arteta’s bland brand of football, we r going 2 struggle this season. The other teams seem 2 b playing protagonist football. Hate 2 admit it but even spuds got a result against kane’$ admirers. Weren’t we after nuno b4 we settled on old boy tet?

Henkamp

Watched a good number of games this weekend and saw that many teams, even Watford, knew how to create chances. A far cry from what we saw from Arsenal on Friday night.

For the spuds, though, I think they’d struggle against teams that play a deep block. Nuno was that way at Wolves. His team looked exciting against the big boys but faltered against defensive teams.

Maybe he could change that with better players at his disposal. Only time will tell.

Runzac

22 attempts friday against Brentford

Naked Cygan

I came to your conclusion about a year ago and had my doubts when the name of Arteta came up. Not sure why we have to put up with this mediocre style of play. Hopefully, the club will get a manager with some tactics up his sleeve. I hope more Arsenal fans watch the game and realize this is not good enough.

truj

What kind of illness do Laca and Auba have?

PolyEmery

Cantscoreitis

truj

MA got some sanssuccessitis too and the team is vaccinated against chancecrativatus.

Zenithreptile

Hearing loss, cataracts, osteoarthritis, liver spots etc

Hakuna Matata

I give u 3 more likes

Naked Cygan

They probably saw Brentford’s lineup and got the sh*ts!! Chelsea and Man City….will make them worse.

El Mintero

There’s been a curious lack of information on their same time sickness…hmm.

Mpls

Acute Apathy.

Twatsloch

There are a few of us in the fanbase suffering from that too.

Vonnie

Manbabyitis.

CLEGooner

Starts with C, ends with oronavirus

Vincent O’Carroll

Gunner since the 70’s so have seen plenty good days and plenty bad ones along the way…..the issue right now and has been for a while ( leaving aside the shite ownership that we can’t change) is that our whole management structure isn’t working….and I feel we can throw whatever money at it…still won’t be working anytime soon…..I feel Brentford should be a real wake up call for absolutely everyone…..apart from Tierney and Smith Rowe who could walk off the pitch with honour the rest of our team were out muscled and out thought by a young keen and physically… Read more »

midgunner

Totally agree with this – well said.

DaDude

Excellent post, thank you.

Čenda

Love this round úplně, awesome one, I am still laughing 🙂

Čenda

*round up, bloody czech correction.

Disarmed Gunner

Getting Odegaard is like getting socks for Christmas. Doesn’t fill one with excitement or inspiration.

Sam I Am

Keeps your toes warm though.

Goonerink

Wtf is Torreria doing at Alton towers?? It’s not like he is tall enough to go on any rides! 😂

Qwaliteee

He got an invitation from Edu.

Man Manny

For me, the best signing would be to get Roman Abramovich as owner on loan till the end of the season. Lampard was kicked out for a lot less than what is being served by the incompetent trio at the helm right now.
Arsenal is in complete shambles at the moment.
The GM, TD and Manager need a huge kick up their backside.

Man Manny

Thomas Tuchel took over Chelsea in January. In 3 games, it was clear what he was about.
Arteta is in his second full season; everything is still up in the air!
Poor tactics, bad man management, poor signings, bad results, yet he trudges on.
Arsenal! How are the mighty fallen.

Matt P

He’s got to go!!!

MojoWillneny

This summer, the top four teams from last season have collectively signed: Lukaku (126.5m), Verane (44m) and Sancho (93.5m), Grealish (129.25m), and Konate’ (44m). And there are still two weeks to go… Arsenal have signed Ben White for (50m). (The two youngsters were not signed to have immediate impact on the first eleven.) Arenal no longer has the players to compete for the Champion’s League. Nor is Arsenal interested in buying players to compete for the Champion’s League. Promising youngsters? Yes, without question. But still, currently Arsenal Football Club has one player who, when fit, plays consistently at CL semifinal… Read more »

Twatsloch

So I reckon we might get Ödegaard too – might – and that will be that as far as purchases are concerned.

Ziich

LOL regarding Toreira. I hope he goes isne he does not seem to have the desire to play here anymore.Nothing on Kola or Willian unfortunately

Sachin

Am I the only one who thinks Auba and Arteta aren’t getting along and that the club would love to get rid and invest in a younger star? This isn’t just smoke, guys. If not this window then later but something is surely broken between the two. Say what you want about Levy but the guy represents his shit club in a formidable, clear way. The lack of a similar leadership is hurting our club. At the moment this is a scam. Peddle utter shit, talk about Arsenal DNA via an ex-player management duo and young potential superstars, promise Europe… Read more »

Matt P

Maybe they got Edu and Arteta cos they thought fans might be more patient and easier on former players, which I certainly think has been borne out to an extent. I don’t know, I am probably being too cynical.
Both are big problems and need to go.

benjmin

Sell them all excluding Laca.

podgygooner

…including Lacka!

Kentish Gooner

What’s Kim Kallstrom doing these days?

meletios

So…Roma have ~30m for Tammy but could not do 20m for Xhaka…
Also..that’s our best fit midfielder at present, indicates the level we are at too.

Just to spite Roma…we should buy Tammy and then offer Xhaka to them, as they can’t use the “no money” excuse anymore.

DaDude

Well, good idea, but it’s too late for that. 😉

meletios

Indeed my good Dude

heihaci

Edu=Clown
Arteta=Poundland Pep. Not sure why so many fans bought this “trust the process” nonsense

Whole club is rub by amateurs from the top down