The ink is barely dry on Declan Rice’s contract and here we are again, standing on the precipice of another transfer window…
It’s unclear at the moment where Arsenal’s priorities lie. Spend big on a prolific striker, strengthen a midfield that currently leans on the creaking legs of Partey, Jorginho and Elneny, bolster a defence without Timber and Tomiyasu or, f*ck it, buy another first-choice goalkeeper just to keep things interesting.
Aside from Cedric, who has been wrapped up with a bow and placed under a tree on the outskirts of Villarreal, it’s hard to see Mikel Arteta sanctioning exits. That said, strange things happen in January. We once bought a player nursing a broken back.
Ahead of the madness, the poo-o-meter returns. Remember, the more sh*t on show, the less likely a deal.
INCOMINGS
Victor Osimhen
Source: Various
The chat: Arsenal’s strikers don’t score enough goals, so it makes sense to be linked with a player who bagged 31 in Serie A last season. The only hitch; the Nigeria international is just about to pen new terms with Napoli with a release clause in excess of £110 million. I think we can safely say, this rumour is dead for six months, at least.
Poo-o-meter: 💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩
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Ivan Toney
Source: Literally the whole Internet
The chat: Toney’s ban from football – brought about by 232 breaches of the FA’s betting rules – ends in mid-January and Brentford expect several clubs to make an approach. The warning from technical director Lee Dykes: “There should be interest, and maybe the time comes very shortly that Ivan moves on to another club. But they will have to pay a decent transfer fee to acquire his services because he is some talent.” Even if Arsenal are interested, it feels like we’d have to sell to able to get a deal over the line. Bear in mind, we’ve already committed to giving the Bees £27 million for David Raya next summer and we’re apparently sailing pretty close to the FFP winds.
Poo-o-meter: 💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩
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Dominic Solanke
Source: Daily Star
The chat: You know those videos that do the rounds on Christmas morning when spoilt kids go mental on camera because they’ve not been gifted some ridiculously expensive gadget they wanted? That was basically the vibe when word broke that Arsenal have been keeping tabs on Solanke. After stints at Chelsea and Liverpool, the 27-year-old has made a home at Bournemouth over the last four years and has scored more goals for the Cherries than you might expect; 65 in 193 appearances. Sure, if you dig a little deeper, you realise only 18 of those have been scored in the Premier League but that serves you right for being a stickler for detail. If his name is on the shopping list for January, we suspect he’s probably not that high up. At the same time, he’s probably nearer our budget.
Poo-o-meter: 💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩
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Douglas Luiz
Source: Various
The chat: We’ve pushed hard for the Brazil international on a couple of occasions and twice been rebuffed by Aston Villa. If a deal was going to get done, it would have been in 2022 when the player’s contract was nearly up. However, he signed a new deal and has since become a vital cog in Emery’s midfield. Given Villa are riding high, it seems incredibly unlikely they’ll part with a star player for anything less than mega-money. The same stands for Ollie Watkins, whose name also pops up as an Arsenal target at this time of year.
Poo-o-meter: 💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩
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Amadou Onana
Source: Mail Sport
The chat: If Luiz is out of reach, but we still want a midfielder, where else do we look? Well, the Mail reckons Goodison Park where 22-year-old Amadou Onana – last night’s penalty aside – is growing in stature. The Senegal-born Belgium international has now racked up 51 appearances for the Toffees since signing from Lille in the summer of ’22 and is being tipped for bigger and better things. While Everton’s finances were enough of a mess to earn them a 10-point FFP-related points deduction, we’re not sure they are under pressure to sell big names in January.
Poo-o-meter: 💩💩💩💩💩💩
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Joao Palhinha
Source: Various
The chat: Murmurs of interest in Palhinha have been doing the rounds for a couple of months. The Portugal international was a whisker away from joining Bayern Munich on Deadline Day before Fulham pulled the plug on a £65 million deal. He’s a very talented player but if the Gunners are going to spend huge money, we probably wouldn’t do it on a 28-year-old. Also, Bayern are still said to be interested and confident of getting their man. A bidding war with the Germans doesn’t sound appealing.
Poo-o-meter: 💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩
OUTGOINGS
Cedric Soares
Source: ESPN
The chat: Arsenal are pretty light at right-back with Jurrien Timber sidelined for the season and Takehiro Tomiyasu due at the Asia Cup (if he can get fit in time). Against that backdrop, you wonder if the club might think twice about offloading Cedric six months early. At the same time, the guy has barely featured, we wanted rid of him last summer and getting his wages off the bill and a nominal fee sounds very appealing. If Villarreal really want the Portugal international, Arsenal won’t stand in their way.
Poo-o-meter: 💩💩
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Jakub Kiwior
Source: Various
The chat: Kiwior hasn’t played nearly as much as he might have hoped since signing from Spezia last January but it still seems very unlikely we’d offload a player who can provide back-up for Gabriel and Oleksandr Zinchenko on the left side of defence. All the same, someone (probably his agent) is planting rumours about a possible exit with AC Milan, Napoli and even Brentford listed as possible destinations. While he’s still finding his feet at the Emirates, we just can’t see him being moved on unless there was a wild bid.
Poo-o-meter: 💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩
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Aaron Ramsdale
Source: Various
The chat: Ever since he lost his status as Arsenal number one to David Raya, there have been rumours linking the England international with a January move. An injury to Nick Pope put Newcastle in the frame, while Chelsea have also been mentioned. To be honest, Ramsdale would be well within his rights to ask for a move, especially with Euro 2024 on the horizon, but it seems unlikely Arteta would trade him now knowing he’d have to spend a good chunk of what he receives on a replacement. If he’s going to leave, we reckon it’ll be in the summer.
Poo-o-meter: 💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩
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Eddie Nketiah
Source: Various
The chat: The logic seems to be, if Arsenal need to sign a new striker perhaps we could raise funds by selling Eddie. Despite interest from West Ham and Palace, we can’t see it. Certainly not next month. Not only is he getting plenty of game time this season, his form was recognised with an England debut and he’s now on hefty wages following the signing of a new deal at Arsenal in June. Also, he’s part of a potential title-winning squad alongside several mates, would you jump ship now? Erm, no.
Poo-o-meter: 💩💩💩💩💩💩
What about Hato? 🙏
We hato sell or hato buy?
I’m getting a pretty new hato for Christmas. Should go well with my new shirto too.
Ah, my Spanish cousin, Juan cinco Hato.
Por qué el tiene una
gorrahato más que tú?Baxter, you know I don’t speak Spanish.
Anyone see Liverpool dismantle West Ham? We best be sharp come the weekend. They’re deadly quick. Picking up points here would be a big statement! COYG, time to fucking make one!
he doesn‘t either…
I’m just picturing Arseblog throwing a tantrum when he opens a present with Cedric inside!! 🎄
I’d be throwing a lot more than a tantrum if I opened a present and found a whole-ass guy inside
What about if you found a whole ass-guy instead?
And you know Cedric will celebrate in the background…
*group hug
I’d like us to make a move for Gyökeres at Sporting, but I reckon that should wait until the summer as well. A midfielder to cover for Rice/Partey would be nice.
Agree on Ramsdale, should not go until the summer.
Gyokeres has a 100m+ release clause. That kind of money would be better spent on Oshimen.
Toney would be a good option for January. Brentford seem willing to sell
On us sailing close to the FFP wind and the Raya deal being a loan for that reason – I wonder if the fact we loaned Raya on 15th August and then sold Balogun on 30th August means anything? In mid August we might have feared noone would bid enough for Balogun and we’d have to loan him for a year before selling but then later managed to find a deal. Could mean a bit of money to spend, though probably wishful thinking!
Possibly. Also if you can get a loan for a year it’s beneficial to us over Brentford anyway.
I think with CL qualification for next season (plus this years income for L16 or QF onward) we will have an assumed 80-100m extra than previous EL seasons.
We’re definitely in good stead I don’t think we will have to worry about FFP as much going forward
I’m guessing the stoney silence about Balogun these days means things aren’t going amazingly at Monaco?
You hate to see it. You really do.
14 games, 4 goals, 4 dimes… I think he’s doing ok (although I’m only judging from those very superficial numbers). Best of luck to the lad! He wanted to play and he’s getting his wish we cashed in and it appears we needed those funds to help balance the books.
Judge me all you want, but I don’t want Balogun to succeed. I hope he has a good enough career. But if he’s smashing in goals for Madrid in 3 years then I’m going to be pissed.
Fair. Still, I like the guy!
I was so excited about him in an arsenal shirt. I think Arteta just felt his vibe wasnt quite right with the squad though, and he seems to know a thung or two about mentality and unity.
Those numbers don’t sound ok to me tbh. When you consider he put up a bit of a stink to play more to prove how good he is, and the numbers end up being comparable to Eddie, who I also want to be sold for not being good enough anyway!
1 goal in his last 9 league games. Not exactly pulling up trees.
I would really hope for Zubimendi, but think it would be super-mega-difficult in January (probably 11 poo’s). I agree with blogs here, and hope for a midfielder.
CM should be the priority. Partey & Elneny are on their way out so that is the long term gap in the squad that needs filling and it makes sense now because we’re so light.
People other forums seem to think that selling Eddie is the answer to everything but I can’t see us getting an upgrade at a reasonable rate and Eddie has been perfectly solid.
Also, other players who play CM can be repositioned to provide cover if we sign a midfielder.
Havertz can become cover right across the front three. So can Trossard.
So yeah, I think signing a 6 or an 8 would really help the squad as a whole. But a really smart RB / LB loan move would be amazing too. But what are the chances of finding that unicorn?
Not now Lichtsteiner! We’re trying to think.
“what are the chances of finding that unicorn?”
I’d say about 10 poos.
It’s raining poo today. Shitloads of the stuff.
A big part of me thinks that our success this season will be down to players like Kiwior, Vieira, Nelson and ESR.
If these question marks can find form and assimilate into this arsenal side then we can definitely go all the way.
We’re going to need them, that’s for sure. No way we should be selling squad players this January.
I disagree. Our success will come down to our first XI staying healthy and performing. That’s the crux of it. The less these fringe guys (Kiwior/Vieira/ESR/ Nelson, and even Eddie) play (in the EPL) the better really, because it means guys like Saliba, Gabby, Zinny, White, Rice, Ode, Martinelli, Saka, Jesus, Havertz, Trossard are all healthy; the healthier they are the better for our prospects on the season. An argument could be made that there still is some space for ESR/Vieira to step into the #8 role as Havertz hasn’t sealed his place yet, but that door is fast closing… Read more »
But there’s about a 0% chance of our first XI staying healthy. And even if they did, you can’t play them 3 times a week. Otherwise they definitely will run out of steam and we’ll lose ground in April and May.
We all know our first XI are exceptional. And if they were impervious to injury and fatigue then we’d win every trophy on the planet.
But, IMHO, it’ll likely be when we really need a performance out of Kiwior or Vieira that will define our season.
I think we might be going wrong by organizing mid week friendlies during peak season that push us to 3 games in a week. Let’s just stick with our already busy schedule without the extras. My “thoughts and prayers” as they say still go to staying healthy. Less is more with the fringe guys.
For me, success looks like going deep in the CL and hopefully the FA Cup too. Plus making a really strong title challenge.
So yeah. If we’re doing things right it’ll be three games a week. A lot for our first XI to handle. Hence the need for our fringe players to step up.
a run-in from ESR like he had during the 2022 run-in would not go amiss. banging in goals from the bench left right and centre. If we can get him firing he could be very useful to our title charge.
Totally agree. You win a title when the guy from the bench scores the goal you need and does same if he replaces an injured starting XI. Just like Ljungberg did when Pires got a cruciate ligament and Freddie scored plenty of goals to help win the league.
Can you believe it was only 7 months ago that Rob fricking Holding was playing season-defining games for us at CB?
Kinda judge myself for believing we could win the league.
Poor old Rob. He’d never looked as bad as during that run. Still can’t believe how little we got for him though, nonetheless. Clubs really do pay big for potential. Still can’t get over Brewster for 20m…
Big, fat, no to Solanke. He’s in decent form at the moment but he’s absolutely not title challenging quality.
It is interesting that he’s come good. We spent a lot of time as a fanbase going “How can Liverpool get £20m for Solanke and we only got £5m for Calum Chambers????”
Answer – Solanke is quite good. Calum Chambers, not so much.
Feels like it will be nearly impossible to do a significant deal in January. But my wishlist for the next two windows is a CM, cover for Saka like a Pedro Neto type (I’d still take Jarrod Bowen), and cover at CB.
No way Kiwior goes in Jan. We’re thin in defense already, and he’s already integrated into the system. Plus he can play both CB and FB, which is exactly the sort of player Arteta wants.
Should Partey be on the possible outgoing list if we can identify a replacement that’s gettable in in Jan?
even if he’s fit, the AFCON makes any kind of deal getting done for Partey in January quite difficult. Not impossible but pretty tough. 8 poos.
No, Partey is absolute class when he is fit. If we can have him at 100% for the last months of the season we are so much stronger.
I don’t know who plays left back other than Cedric if Ben White is injured, or if Saliba is injured and White plays centre half. Obviously, that’s a big step down, but it is tolerable for a few games. If Tomiyasu recovers quickly, he will be playing for Japan, not for us. If Timber recovers quickly, it will transform modern medicine.
Right back, don’t know how that happened.
Cedric, better back than Eddie is Jesus
Likelyhood of none in none out in January window, can’t see us paying over the odds for a quality CF or CM from any team in the PL, a loan deal for one player from a Europe side is more likely tho i can’t see it, does anyone have a clue when Partey is coming to the party, 🤔 i haven’t a clue to his expected squad inclusion date..
I doubt we will get a forward, noone out there good enough and how would they integrate.
Probably wait till summer and if Boniface is as good as current form, he’s worth a look .
If Barcas money situation is still dodgy then Ferran Torres or Raphina on loan with a sweetener, would be good to hit the ground running .
I’m not for the Ivan Toney transfer, he’s alot to prove and is a bit limited .
CDM or LCM I think ideal and achievable option is rabiot