Saturday, May 25, 2024

Arsenal 5-0 Chelsea – player ratings

Arsenal moved four points clear at the top of the Premier League this evening after spanking Chelsea 5-0.

A Leandro Trossard strike early on handed the Gunners a 1-0 lead at the break, while the opposition were fortunate not to be down to 10 men after a horrendous Nicholas Jackson challenge on Takehiro Tomiyasu.

In the second half, Ben White and Kai Havertz grabbed a brace each to completely overrun Mauricio Pochettino’s side, and in truth we could have scored more. All in all, a very enjoyable night.

Here’s how the players rated this evening.

Read the Arsenal 5-0 Chelsea match report and see the goal here

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Arsenal 5-0 Chelsea – Player Ratings

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65m paid back with interest.


Let’s keep it going for the next few matches!

Tomaury Bischfeld

I’ve heard he adopts donkeys – think Nicholas Jackson might be looking for a new home.


Outstanding comment


A pretty boring day in the office for big Gabi and Saliba 😆 . Havertz celebrations for the goals were awesome, he forgot stamford bridge already.


Oh I don’t think he forgot it at all.


So, so bad 🤣🤣🤣 Jackson is terrible, and it’s hilarious.


One thing about Jackson, he always seems to find himself in good scoring positions. It’s not easy. If he fixes his finishing, he’ll be something.


His quality is League maybe. Watched a lot of him this year, and God, please. How many chances against Man shitty in the fa cup? Boss of the lineup Nicholas.🤣🤣🤣


King Kai! Superb tonight. He’s happy now at a proper club with proper teammates.


I Hate Chelsea

Emi Rates

“I Hate Chelsea”

– Mudryk




That alone is worth 6 stars


99.9% of me hates Chelsea. But that tiny bit is grateful to them fur buying Mudryk. If not, would we have Rice?

Thierry Bergkamp (non negotiable)

Interesting! I never thought of it like that, I always thought of not having Trossard

Emi Rates

No Trossard and no Rice but a 100 million quid bumbling fool with shit hair and even shitter tattoos stinking up our attack.


Hates chelsea.


Hates Chelsea

Kampala gooner

and to think that some if that money was used to procure jackson. hihihihihihihihihi. what a bunch of twats

Dr Zebra

What a match. Feels great to add to the embarrassment of that filthy club. Missed a few chances and also let them feel like they had a chance in the first half but maybe that made the second half even sweeter! Gotta keep on dreaming!

More of this on Sunday please


Imagine being a Chelsea fans right now. Where do you even find the energy to “support” that club? The ultimate proof that you can’t buy class, even with infinite money.


Sure you can. Chelsea just seem strangly terrible at it 🙂




Havertz was glorious tonight. Some of his flicks in the first half were Giroud esque.. Trossard is a baller.. but my word what a talent we have in Odegaard. Genuinely one of the best players on the planet. He walks into any side- Liverpool, City and Madrid included. And he’s all ours.


I said weeks ago that his song needs to be sung more at the Emiratea. He has relished the extra responsibility that comes with being captain and has found a scary consistency! He does things with the ball exactly the way his mind pictures them — very similar to a certain Dutch footballer we used to have around these parts.

Skinny Ricki

Couldn’t agree more with that. And the great thing about this team is that an equally compelling case can be made for so many others: Saka, Rice, Saliba, Gabriel – so much talent, so much character.

Skinny Ricki

And Ben White! What a player. What a man.

Trixie Popsicle

‘Baller’? Wth is that?


Spurs had a two week break but played two games less than villa, who are in europe, something wrong with that


It could be a disadvantage for them (being rusty). Good thing that we now have 4 days of rest before that — will help a lot.


They’ve had a rest, but we’ve just tonked a London rival. Rather be in our position going into the game!


Luckily they’re shit, so it won’t matter.


Both of Havertz’s goals such proper centre forward goals, he’s really metamorphosising before our very eyes… and both against his former club where other than a few good moments he was basically a depressed little caterpillar.

And then our fans getting to sing “waka waka, hey hey…” in front of that lot, ha ha you couldn’t have written it any better


Don’t disagree but sometimes I wish someone inject a bit of blood in him, he lacked that killer instinct in the first half.


Yup. Actually made bad mistakes and bad choices in the first half (while leading the line well) but in the second half he stuck it to them brilliantly and was immense. Love him!


Love him too!


Sure, but there have been many good strikers down the years that miss presentable chances. The fact that he was able to put the poorer moments of the first half behind him and come back stronger in the 2nd is a great sign of his mentality


Lol. They fled home in droves before it was well over. Glorious sight seeing the sh*t fest they are serving up these days.

Gunnar Elí

I did say to a friend in the dying minutes of the 1st half. I want Kai to score against them .

the scenes !


Partey – what a ballah

It Is What It Is

Thought he was vital today. Closing down, mopping up, intercepting, and releasing the ball early. Not back to his best, but we’ve missed him big time.

Enzo and Cucarella are absolute clowns.


Woohoo. Come on you gunners!


0/10 for Cucurella (curaracha). What an annoying player, loved seeing him get beaten over and over again by Arsenal.

I love this team.

The Arsenal

Loved Kai’s first goal as cucurella was trying to hard for so long. Didn’t even seem like Kai knew he was there


Outstanding all over the place, could have been 10-1…. what a performance from White, Rice, MØ, Havertz, Trosard, ….
Bonus for me tonight: Oh boy, how i’ve missed that speciaal TP to Saka long diagonal pass


TP had some lovely moments, you forget how much of a flair player he can be out of that DM position, such a luxury to have him as a rotation option especially if the rust is now finally coming off. Would you start him or Jorgi at Spurs now? I think he’s made that a real question with his performance today.


Thomas must start with Declan – it was pure poetry tonight. That sweeping first-time touch into Declan’s path to set up Trosser?? WOW!!

Cannon and ball and arsen’all

I thought TP was excellent – I was having the conversation on the way down about whether we should keep TP or Jorg or both – I still can’t make my mind up – ideally both, but my position was we’ve not seen TP / Ode / Rice midfield this season and it could be a thing of beauty – tonight just illustrated the potential there IF we could keep TP fit. Imagine when those 3 a familiar with one another and have fully clicked


Thomas when fit is a brilliant midfielder, I agree that midfield 3 is tantalising. But if we get a good offer for him this summer we should resist that tantilisation(?) and seize it, too unreliable fitness-wise and not getting any younger…


But only if we get a really good offer, I’m talking 25-30mil+. If we don’t I’d be more than happy to keep him for one more season.

Cannon and ball and arsen’all

I can’t see us getting more than £20m, and if that’s the case then keep him for the final year of his deal and roll the dice on him I’d say


He does free up Rice and I still think arsenal are much better with those three playing together. I hope that his injury nightmare is over because there is still an amazing player there.

The Arsenal

Keep both. Add another and release Elneny.

Thierry Bergkamp (non negotiable)

Imagine we’re where we are and Thomas/Rice have started 4 games together (I think it is), and Thomas played right back for 3 of those

Alex Nagy

F*cking Fantastic. This Kai Havertz redemption arc is something special!


Much shorter than Xhaka s :p


My Chelsea friend texted me “classy from Kai” after his first goal. I told him he should ask himself why a player would do that…


You might have replied – ‘he hates Chelsea, what do you expect you silly sausage?’


The Chelsea fans booed him at Stamford Bridge in October. I am all for showing respect to ex-teams and ex-players but it goes both ways. If you boo a player, you can’t expect them not to celebrate


I presume your friend was referring to the run, holding off Cucubellender with his little finger and smashing the ball into the net? It was classy.

Thierry Bergkamp (non negotiable)

For months, Kai has been hearing that we gave them free money. Now he must show respect! Bitter😀

Yankee Gooner

Excellent performance, heads screwed on straight, chomping at the bit for the Sp*rs match. Additionally, I am starting to think Nicholas Jackson might also hate Chelsea, 300 million and a midfield that cannot string 5 passes together, shambles.


Makes you appreciate Arteta more, few seasons ago we played like them. He came, signed some good players, and now we are challenging for the PL


Can you please remind me of the time we finished tenth in the league? What 1995? We haven’t played that bad in 30 years


I don’t think we have had a more complete performance all season. 8+ for each of them tonight, but special mention for the midfield: Partey had one or two rusty moments but overall was so good (one dummy in the first half is what he was doing all the time when he first joined. Rice was up and down the pitch all night long (would love to know how many miles he ran), but MOTM was an easy choice (amazing when two players scored a brace). Odegard’s range of passing and ability to get out of tight corners was the… Read more »


But until then you shall be 52, as Blogs might say…

Austin Bud

well in maths fractions you round up to the nearest number 😉

Thierry Bergkamp (non negotiable)

Like the players, I hope we all hate Chelsea


Glad Ødegaard got his assists today. He should have two every game with these passes

John D

Thought partey makes such a difference to the team when fit and playing. Jorginho in that 6 as we all now tidy , keeps us ticking and very good on the ball. However the way partey plays vertical passes through the lines to break the block is just so key, and you see how his team mates are aware and switch on when he has the ball.

The Arsenal

Partey gets the forward players on the ball quicker and from more hurtful areas and angles. I curse his fitness record because on form I wouldn’t replace him with any 6 in the world…even rodri

Exit the Lemming

If only we could swap their medical records….

El Mintero

He’s absolutely key. Frees up rice and allows Havertz to play up front. Can’t help thinking “what if” he started against Bayern and Villa.


Vieira is so lightweight but oh my god the boy has end product. He was on for 10 mins and could have had a goal and assist. A very confusing but likeable player


Yeah – I have a sneaky feeling that if he just gets enough minutes to settle into this league, he could be a future great.

Exit the Lemming

Yes, they’re a player in there but he always nseems to wearing some sort of Star Trek ‘cloaking’ device. Would love to see what his contribution would be if we were 5 down and he was subbed on with 8 minutes to play.


Tbh I never want to see that.


Cucurella is the poor man’s Guendouzi. He was so calm and hates Chelsea.


For whatever reason cucurella is a player I intensely dislike. The hair, never shave and the whining. The whining.


The whining ugly.


Yep – he truly is a deeply irritating little man.

Exit the Lemming

Agreed but I thought he bossed Saka throughout.


OK……I would love to get “bossed” like that every time I play

The Arsenal

The tantrum after whites first goal was glorious to watch.

Death by 300,000 Passes

Haha, we got Guendo for 7 mil and Chelsea got Cucu for 65. Mayby not poor’s, but stupid’s.


65 millions down the drain…


Trossard had a statement game, especially that first half. Really feel he stamped his place as a starter today…Some moments from him today reminded me of Cazorla vs Man City.


Crappy-doo you beat me to it by mere seconds 🙂 chapeau my friend.


You can’t have em all Ebo! 🫡


I wrote in the week about Trosser being so desperatly needed in our front line because of his ability to just fire off the snap-shot of either foot without dithering or try to pass it into the net.
Fuck me, did he do that tonight!


I hope tonight makes every horrible, arrogant, racist, John Terry-loving Chelsea fan in the world utterly miserable, sick, sad, low and want to cry for about weeks.


John Terry is a cunt!

Yankee Gooner

That old chestnut!


Never ages, though!

Aleksander Wło darz

He hates Chelsea tonight! 😅

Exit the Lemming

Stamford Bridge: a holding pen for pot bellied racists. (Frankie Boyle)


Have to say as well, I really love Gabriel Martinelli and think he’ll come good again, but for the rest of this season Trossard has that spot pretty much nailed down with steel bolts, really the last question about him was whether he can deliver when he starts and now he’s answered that too these last two games. Brilliant player.

Death by 300,000 Passes

We all hate Chelsea.

Billy bob

With a PASSION!!! I hope they disappear into oblivion!!!


How nice it felt to see Partey regain some of his former self. We’ve certainly missed his direct forward passing this season. Let the guy cook please!


Bit harsh on Tomiyasu, I thought he was great tonight! Several times he made really powerful interceptions that started attacks

It Is What It Is

And he’s starting to show he’s also a baller. Good movement, flicks, combination play with Rice, on top of interceptions and anticipation. Was worried when he was down, as he’s our best LB, after Timber.


Like Maupay, add Nicholas Jackson to the list of “we don’t know how they are in the premier league” players


I spent most of the match wondering if Chelsea were going to bring Mudryk on, then they subbed him off!

Adney Toams

Yeh, I didn’t know he was playing either 😂


To be fair, neither did he.


Was that why he dyed his hair? As a constant reminder that he plays for Chelsea, even he can’t believe it!


I would have thought Badiashile should be top of that list. He hates Chelsea so much he simply refused to pass to them all night.


So good to see Partey back with the real progressive passing from deep. Rice or Jorginho can’t do that and it makes us so dangerous and at speed. Really missed that throughout the season at times as good as we have been


I remembered why they paid so much for partey. Darn injuries.
team was fantastic today. Really really good.
see ya Sunday

Exit the Lemming

Funny thing is, he hardly ever missed a game when at Atletico Madrid and they play a very high intensity and aggressive pressing game. I would love to know why he’s missed so many games for Arsenal


Gary Driscoll. Look at Manure now


I’ve missed Partey in that midfield. His calming presence and forward thinking is under rated. He deserves an 8


We hate Chelsea and we hate Chelsea. We are the Chelsea

Celebration Police

Now, that’s how you put an unwanted neighbor out of the neighborhood.
On a different note, anyone noticed how effective Saka was today?
It’s very likely that Partey will leave at the end of the season but we have to replace him with someone with his skill sets. Saka hasn’t been this effective in our recent games, but Partey’s game seems to enhance his game.

Exit the Lemming

I thought Saka was our least effective player today


You forgot everyone hates chelsea in the bonus


Also nit picking, but rest sake, rice and martin in first round of subs, need to protect the most important players.
Still, what a result.


Agree, it’s nitpicking, but why is Odegaard staying on at 4-0 and 5-0 when he’s looked so exhausted in some recent games?

I’m sure Arteta and his stuff know what they’re doing (at least maybe if I repeat that enough times I’ll believe it) but I’d really like to know the answer to that.


Wish I could vote this comment up 10 times


Can I just say that without a doubt I loathe Chelsea even more than I fucking hate Stoke.

Exit the Lemming

We all hate Stoke but they’re not a threat. Chelsea’s money makes them a threat.


Was their a chant for Mudryk, anyone who was there tonight?

I couldn’t pick anything up clearly on the telly… but the lads were LOUD!!

Jo jeffery

Ben White. Fabulous. Getting better and better at crunch time.


Really didn’t see a lot of rust in Partey’s play, I thought he was exceptional in winning the ball back and had some beautiful ball distribution going forward. 8.5/10. I love this team! COYG!

Exit the Lemming

Yep,he was excellent and looked like he’d never been away but gave away possession in the 2nd half and should have been booked trying to retrieve his error.


Was very excited for this game and now that feels justified. That was about as close as I’ve seen to my ideal 11 for the run in. Partey back and showing why he was so important last season, Tomiyasu defending high up the pitch, Trossard terrorising the left flank. Helps that Chelsea had a weak back four and no Palmer. We looked a bit open at times in the first half but I think this line-up settled beautifully in the second. Unlikely Partey will stay there for the next few games, let alone into next season, but what a powerful… Read more »

Kim Kallstrummingmyselfsilly

Pretty sure I speak for everyone when I say that if odegard is able to produce a 9.5 after the amount of minutes he’s played, you are surely able to do a fourth podcast in 2 days. These are the foggin standards

Kim Kallstrummingmyselfsilly

Ps please do the #pochout, thanks

Jesus of Sao Paulo

Aren’t we three points on top though? You seem to have completed forgotten about Liverpool which is not a bad thing.

Jesus of Sao Paulo

completely. Fuck autocorrect


Martin Odegaard.

Next great Arsenal captain.

Future Arsenal legend.


I guess that when Poch is criticised for his team’s performance in this game, he may respond “Walk a Mile in my Shoes”.

Arshavin’s hat

I grew up in south west London in the 90s and saw firsthand what vile fan base Chelsea has. I hate Chelsea more than Spurs or Utd.

Seriously, guys this was so delicious. I want to powder it and add it to my protein shake. I want to stir it into a liquid and make art with it. I want to gently pan fry it and add it to my pasta. I want to use it as a lubricant.

Exit the Lemming

That what going along nicely until it got to the lube part…

Aleksander Wło darz

For the red card not given I hate Chelsea !

Exit the Lemming

If Jackson had walked they would have had an excuse i.e. playing with only 10 men etc. I was delighted that Tomo was OK and that Jackson stayed on. Timo Werner and Fernando Torres secretly had a love child, and that baby was called…Nicolas Jackson.




Timo Werner and Gervinho.


I was at the game and I think Partey was phenomenal. Found spaces forward time and time again, intelligent placement through and through, tidy besides a couple of interventions.. they could not handle him


Rice and odegaard were phenomenal… i wonder what changed.
Partey magic


Yep – not just bring it all again on Sunday, Thomas!!


Also watching the warm up I could confidently tell Odegaard was up to cause some damage. Everything he did clicked from the very first second. Curious to know if other gooners in the stadium saw this


Really hope we see that same line-up on Sunday. Think we’ll have way too much for the Spuds #COYG

Old Gunner

I’m giving myself 9 out of 10 because I also hate Chelsea.


When Partey plays Rice looks to be at yet another gear (which is already very high). When Partey plays Odin does not have to come back to pick up the ball and thus spends more time and energy driving opposition defenders nuts. Our legs were back. Today, as opposed to the last three games, when we hunted in packs we took the ball from the opposition and kept it. My theory is that we were very tense in the last several games and that tension saps energy. Today we got off to a fast start and relaxed. Everytime we scored… Read more »


Arseblog 11/10. Fucking excellent. Hates Chelsea.

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