Tuesday, June 25, 2024

Man Utd v Arsenal – single word review and player ratings (illness/injury special)

It pains us to have to think about today’s game again but needs must, so here are the player ratings and reviews. This time the theme is injury/illness – which is appropriate because most of us will be suffering a hangover tomorrow as well as having had Arseitis inflicted upon us.

Vito Mannone: 6/10 – mild hayfever

Bacary Sagna: 5/10 – Concussion

Per Mertesacker: 6/10 – Sniffles

Thomas Vermaelen: 2/10 – Dislocated spine

Andre Santos: 2/10 – Amoebic dysentery

Mikel Arteta: 5/10 – Hamstrung

Jack Wilshere: 4/10 – ADHD

Santi Cazorla: 6/10 – Scarlet fever

Lukas Podolski: 2/10 – Acute invisibility

Aaron Ramsey: 2/10 – Brewer’s droop

Olivier Giroud: 4/10 – Nappy rash


Theo Walcott: 4/10 – Impacted colon

Andrei Arshavin: 5/10 – Delirium tremens

Feel free to discuss and post your own ratings, but normal comment policy applies. If you’re not familiar with it, please read.

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Arsenal overall: Bipolar disorder


Arsenal overall – ‘devoid of belief’.

And who is supposed to set them up to believe ?

Red & White Stripey Socks

Would that be the Manager?


I was once an admirer of Wenger. But now, I don’t now. A lot of of his recent decisions on players and tactics and his innability to battle motivate players really dissapont me.


I think Arsene is not evolving with time…its all good keeping yourself up-to-date in finance/economics area, making sure club does good business, makes profit and ultimately he earns ~7 million for that…which is very good… but I assume his main role still is to win trophies…or am I missing something, I thought football clubs play football to win matches and trophies… or has the footballing world moved on very fast while I was sleeping that now they #1 care is profit and then football…. having said that in the AGM , if Ivan and other cronies in the board have… Read more »

We gunner do em!

Arsenal – shoddy,

Such a shame we reminded Robin van Persie why he left us to join United……

Master Bates

because he’s a greedy cunt?

the same players that RvP’s not worthy to play will someday fuck off and call the rest of the team not worthy to their level like the way last summer Fabregas and N$ri left because the rest of the team (including RvP) were not good enough for them and has been every summer.

stop glorying assholes like RvP , they are the reason we are in this mess and no the other way around.

Clock End Mike

On the other hand, if heRvP had meant what he said about wanting to win trophies at Arsenal and stayed, I can well imagine that the boot would have been on the other foot and we could have murdered that Man Utd team if he’d been on the right side.

Rather than reminding him why he left, we reminded him how important it was that he should have stayed.


Kroenke and Gazidis: Pancreatic cancer. Slowly killing the team from the inside.

Cygan's Magical Left Foot

1 is the number of sad puppy called KidKnockout.

I dislike and can’t stand Stan the Yank, Ivan the Lappy and I have been calling for Arsene head calling him the French Fool, Bank Manager, Liar and brainless among other names for the last two years. But I never wish death or illness on anyone.


Its the same every year or has been last three or four seasons….. Good players out. Some mid rate in with a few potential youngsters. Creaking…..I dont get why guys like chamakh giroud squillaci arrive at Arsenal n become useless …. Tactics motivation blend with team. Its late and my head hurts thinking about this


it was not MU vs Ars game but MU vs norwich or reading or sumting..Ars was just too afraid of man u..i wonder why santos played full time:-(


Were just not as good as them they took our best player. We need to gel and for our best player (Santi) to be a



Gooner Al

I have been in a bad mood since the final whistle. But Blogs has just brightened up my day. I do like the single word reviews!


Arsenal away fans- 9.5/10 Passed medical with flying colours. Except the odd sneeze here and there.


Should be 10/10 – lives to the age of 130 and passes away peacefully


Business > Football

Bobby Pires

You’ll probably get a job on our board with that attitude, mate.


Which was the point I was making. Well done for missing it.


Away fans: 10/10 – Headache


Ruptured ear drum.


Count myself very lucky today. Up in Scotland with no TV or phone signal (til now) so have had to rely on the Arseblog report and comments. Sounds like yet another sack of shit. Something is very very wrong at our club at the moment and the only thing we know for certain is we don’t know what it is. So we’re left to speculate. There’s no doubt in my mind that the Club has decided we can’t compete with Citeh, the Chavs or Mancs, so let’s not bother. We’re better than Spuds, Liverpool, Newcastle etc, so let’s finish 4th… Read more »


“So we’re left to speculate.” “What else is painfully blindingly obvious is we are run to make money. That’s more of a priority to the Club than winning trophies.” >implying something non-a priori without evidence I see what you did there. “I don’t understand what Kroenke sees in Arsenal other than an investment to realise in some way shape or form at some stage.” Of course he sees it as an investment. Who would want to throw away millions of dollars for nothing? If Arsenal loses CL spots etc and revenue, the investment will fail. Logically he will want Arsenal… Read more »


Anon. How about the board gambles on us getting cl place for the foreseeable. Not a bad call you might say seing as its now 15 years on the trot. Then lets say we get these fabled commercial deals that wil rake in the money as has been promised. Do you not think it possible or even probable that stan is then going to take a large amount of that for himself.
What other possible reason has this prick got involved in our club for.?

Mikel Artekkers

Stop typing “>implying”, this isn’t 4chan and there is no greentext here.

big dawg

Excuse me, here in Scotland we do have tv and phone signal! Hmph! You make it seem as though we’re in the stone age…


Heh. I apologise mate, but visit Applecross.


Van Persie can go suck a bag of dicks (I’m sure Santos would love to help him with that).

By the way, Santos seemed to have something similar to Stockholm Syndrome to go along with that bout of the shits you diagnosed.

A N Other

Arsene Wenger – myopia

Number 479



flaccid, can’t get it up, limp, soft, pointless


Santi Cazorla: 6/10 – Scarlet fever

4 at best.

We gunner do em!

Provided the finest goal of the evening.
A 6 should be okay.


Would have helped more had he not kept losing the ball in their half. Same as he did against Chelsea and Schalke.


Accentuate the positive. Just imagine Andre Santos will be part of our team until 2015. ( I ‘m being sarcastic). We were dreadful.


Think you’ve been very kind to Aaron Ramsey as ever. Maybe Captain Shittastic too.

Aside from that, pretty spot on.

Giroud's hard abs

Think Podolski should have a 0. He was hiding the whole game. What is he scared of?



Runcorn Gooner

Santos is making Podolski’s life very difficult.Hurry back Gibbs


And what did Mannone do wrong. I have fuck all confidence in him but for a 3rd choice keeper he did well


Why fuck-all confidence? For a third-choice keeper, I feel he’s been surprisingly solid… Why blame our mistakes on him, when they’ve been attributable to our defensive lapses (mostly errors by Vermaelen and Santos).

Runcorn Gooner

Absolutely agree .I don’t rate him that highly but he made some important saves today.

Clock End Mike

My man of the match (though I was surprised arsenal.com dared to put up a page asking for votes this weekend, what do they expect?)

Proud Gooner NK

At the game, we all chanted ‘ROBIN UR A CUNT” which helped lightened my day after the appalling defeat. I remember when we done that to Na$ri as well. Good times.


Being depressed is all fine and dandy, but no need to start bashing on the board and the club’s ‘ambitions’. No one was angry when we were doing fine the first few games. It’s only after Norwich etc that somehow Kroenke got this much flak, and that the club now “aims for 4th”.

Honestly, we still have 20+ matches to play and we’ve done Chelsea at home, Anfield, OT, Etihad, Stoke. We can ask our questions AFTER the season ends when the hysteria stops and we can think clearly with our final emotions.


come on mate


wonderful, but we’ve all heard that for a while now..Wengers’ infamous judge me at the end of the season is never ending.

we were never in it today. not from the 1st minute. we’ve not been in it at OT for a while…if you keep waiting till the season ends we will never be in it.


Sure we have played our 3 main rivals but the damning thing is we have just 1 point from a possible 9 against them. if that had been 9 we would be top now. its those results that cost you the most. when you finish behind the winners by as many as 5 points at the end of the season its the 2 defeats to them that prove the most costly. we now have to beat both manchester clubs at home and chelsea away to drag ourselves back into this title race and that is as well as not slipping… Read more »


Wigan just beat Spuds at white shart lane, citeh and chelski both drew away from home. everyone but manu dropped points today

Giroud's hard abs

That’s because WE played them! 😀 How could we let them drop points?

Tony Adams morning breath

Why even bother looking at what City and United does. Face the facts mate, our rivals are spuds, Everton, Pool, West Brom etc….

Runcorn Gooner

This year results are very unpredictable.If we can get the team firing properly we
will still be there or thereabouts .
Today was disappointing but a couple of wins and it all changes.Manure were not that good and we can only get better.Jack will get fitter,Gibbs,Diaby,Rosicky to
come back and bolster the team.
It’s still very early days in the season.Always look on the bright side of life.

Proud Gooner NK

Jus hope we beat Spuds in a coupla weeks time!


Sigh. Too early to feel hopeful.


Well, I hope you’re right. I’ve spent a lot of money to come all the way from Norway to see this game. Last time I went we lost to the scousers….. Will be scared to do the trip in the future if we don’t get a result…


to be honest the only one at Arsenal who gives a shit about your money is Stan


Yeah stay @ home mate, the long trip with memories of this filthy defeat ringing on your head.

Runcorn Gooner

You should have picked a dead cert game to win like Norwich…..oops


Mertesacker was so solid today, lost count of how many time he was in the right place at the right time. Reads the game really well and that’s why he’s always there to clear the danger, and with great composure. Would give him either a 7 or 8, Mannone didn’t do much wrong so maybe a 7. Jack before he got sent off would be a 6; actually looked ok compared to the rest of them. All the others were invisible. Apart from our Brazilian friend who got everything completely wrong today. Such an abysmal performance, led to so many… Read more »


Yeah, I think 6/10 is harsh on Mannone, who didn’t, for me, make any mistakes, and made some great saves. Does anyone really think our Polish #1 would have stopped either of those shots? Also, he chose the right direction for the penalty, and looks like he would have been in a good position to save it, if Shrek hadn’t struck wide.

A bit harsh on Arteta, who kept running and fighting, even with Shrek doing a fantastic job marking him the whole game. Wasn’t like he wasn’t trying.


(Oh, for some reason, I read Arteta’s score as 2/10… I guess 5 is fair, given his diminished influence. But I don’t question his spirit and determination, unlike many of the others.)


No candidates? Arteta was and is the only choice.


Definitely. Even when he’s not at his best, he still seems like he’s playing his heart out. And isn’t lazy and careless, like our current captain.


I’m so glad to hear the news that finally arsenal will visit my country, indonesia, next year. Despite, our recent poor performances, I don’t think sacking AW is a good choice right now. Can you imagine if he has all the money mancini or mou or di matteo Currently having? With all the success story of developing young players to becoming a world class, titles that he has given to the club for the past 16 years, I think we all agree that “instant” is not the word we believe in. Football world is different today. Good players know they… Read more »

magic hat

Arteta or Wilshere!


Contrast between Mertesacker’s cool-headedness and Vermaelen’s… er, eccentricity could scarcely have been more stark. The latter’s ability and influence shouldn’t be underestimated – we shouldn’t forget that on his day he can be formidable – but his form’s been very patchy and he could do with having to battle for his position. Right now Mertesacker is by a comfortable distance the most reliable centre-back, and Koscielny deserves a few more run-outs. I do think Vermaelen’s enough of a professional to accept coming off the bench a couple of times, and Arteta can have the armband temporarily. Or maybe give him… Read more »

Snozzcumbers and Frobscottle

Just wanted to say thank you for your username. Has given me a much better memory of Old Trafford to think about. A light in the darkness at the moment.


Arsenal players: consistently complacent, completely disintrested.


Well at least Andre santos is defense immune!


TV 2 what for assists/attempted assists. Santos Santos worse than the Schalke Santos -5 at best and that’s without even thinking about cuntish half time behaviour.
Mannone 8 at least talent / performance well done.
BFG 8 played well again just needs someone next to him.
Board Out, Wenger Out blah blah how about the cheque book.

Entre Dans La

Arsene = Diarrhea of the Anus


We were doing fine in the first few games?? The two goal less draws to sunderland and stoke?? WAKE UP!! Every year the ambition is less and less to now we are over joyed at 4th place, Its time for us to voice our concerns and let these shower of c*nts know that if they want 13.90 for fish and chips and 60 quid to watch a game we want a bergkamp an henry or dare i say it rvp!!


totally agree mate I’ve been angry all day. Thats how I should feel right


cheque book time


I’m always skeptical of player reviews, not in principle, but in practice it tends to be that everyone on the losing team was shit and everyone on the winning team was quite good. Nonsense. Aside from Vermaelen’s howler, we were fine defensively – conceding one goal to Man U isn’t damning and we have (/had?) shipped the least goals in the prem. Seems to me our one key problem is Shots On Target. It’s not rocket science. We had enough posession and were in the right positions to create the kinds of chances which leads to SOTs, but nobody seems… Read more »


Vermaelen makes a major defensive mistake every game. Doesn’t have the mentality/discipline to be captain.


Arsenal have conceded from defensive fuckups more than any other team in the Prem.
That is what my commentators said and I believe them on this point.


Been feeling sick since that fuckhead scored. Thanks for bringing a little smile to my face


Just wanted to note I was impressed with Sagna giving van Persie a “what the fuck do you want” in the tunnel before the game. Top man that. Take your hug and your millions and your “c’mon guys I will always be a gunner” and get the fuck out of my face.


Oh and apart from a couple of lapses man u played pretty average.


As in our lapses gifted the game. I’m drunk and belligerent and using predictive text.


and then the cunt really tried to break his leg again


but the referee only saw it as a ye
llow – it was a red in any game of football.


I’d give Mannone a 7 or 8. Goals were not his fault at all. I remember a couple of fantastic saves. One amazing reflex one with his left hand (from Rooney maybe?), and one great quick throw out to half way to set up a counter attack stick in the memory. Can’t remember anything he did wrong.

Mertesacker could be bumped up too maybe.


Quite pleased with Mannone. No real mistakes, and some amazing saves. Name a goalkeeper who would have made those saves.


seamen 🙁

Clock End Mike

There was only ever one Seaman 😉

jim chiminy

while i’m not excusing the way in which rvp orchestrated his move, perhaps there is something in his comments about ambition. If he was told what ivan the terrible has recently unveiled about being a top team in 2 years then i can understand why he left. Who, at 29, wants to wait 2 yrs before possibly being on a winning team (something we’re all sceptical about). If he had said this i would have been more understanding, but perhaps he agreed with the board and wenger that he would keep quiet until they could put their schemes into effect.… Read more »

Glory Hunter

Everyone of us knows why RVP left, it was disappointing but I understand & accept his reasons. He might be a cunt but he had every right to leave, we are shite & it’s as simple as that. The team is a reflection of the manager, mentally weak! The worst part & as much as it hurts me write this is, if SAF was managing our team he would beat that Man Utd team if it was managed by Wenger! Those are his players, his team, his tactics! He has no excuses! grateful for all he’s done but he’s lost… Read more »


Vermaelen – cyganitis

Big Dave

Can’t believe Santos wasn’t subbed. Really didn’t want to see our players eager to kiss robins arse and his head was practically up it at half time. Should’ve put sagna left and brought Jenkinson on the right – we needed Jenkinsons arsenal heart in there.

the new invincibles

Excellent thought… surely Sagna’s experience would help him fit in at LB.
Or even Vermalean at LB with Kos pairing Mertesacker at CB but no….”Arsene knows best” . Speaking of which, surely that statement must be confirmed tosh by now.He’s lost the plot surely and needs replacing.


I’d give Vito a 7, Sagna a 6, Per a 8, Verm a 1, Wilshere a 5, and Caz a 5 but really the shiniest shit is still shit.


Arsenal were shit today end of! Never looked like competing, a lot of players looked like they couldn’t be bothered, Ramsay as a winger??? Santos is shit! Arsenal are nowhere near good enough to challenge at the top level at the moment, so frustrating! I love arsenal but we’re so frustrating at the moment


United fans – 1/10. Lockjaw.

kiss my arsenal

did you hear them chanting something about jimmy saville no doubt directed at wenger? vile scum


Food for thought….how come in d past 5 season with different sets of players its the same issues with the squad over and over again? We’re seeing a disjointed Arsenal team yet again. I think a revamp of the coaching staff is imminent.


required but not imminent


Its precisely because for the past 5 season we have had different sets of players that we have a disjointed team and the same issues with the squad over and over again. What other club has had their captains agitate for moves over and over. Vieira, Henry, Fabregas, RVP.


No urgency in the team today. 2 goals in our last 3 games along with 3 conceded is just not good enough for a team like Arsenal. Massive respect to our away fans singing there hearts out today. Still can’t get my head around why our home support isn’t the same. Be glad when this weekends over. Roll on Schalke on Tuesday.

Mental Strength

Arsene Wenger – Bipolar Disorder

Small Dave

What is really sad is our general acceptance of 4rth. Not so long ago 2nd was considered a failure. As fans we always stand up for gooner players but we have to realise this team has too many average lads who we are carrying. Mannone, Santos, Vermaelan, Ramsey, Podolski, Giroud, Gervinho etc are not players who the top teams would take. They are players who when in competition with Man City, Man Utd and Chelski’s millions are eaten alive in the hunt for trophies. We have a great business model and so on but I really don’t give a fuck… Read more »

donal doherty

As much as I love and proud of arseblog/arsenal,I think your pre judgmental view of players has an effect on their ratings.for what Andre santos did around the game deserves a two,for his play,at least 4.he was better than I expected against Valencia.o and add managers selection to the ratings?it’s a irish web award podcast winning idea?

The optimist

Still got the best defence in the league.
Just need a proper striker a la RVP(cunt) in the window. Falcao would do it…..


LOL, best defense in the league. That’s a joke, since it includes Vermaelen.


You optimist, you!

The optimist

The stats don’t lie my friend
And we have played the top 3 (2 away from home)


Why would Falcao come to Arsenal? Seriously, he’ll go to Manchester/Real Madrid/Barcelona/ or similar top club

the new invincibles

Leave it off will ya! The real problem is the manager…. he’s bought poorly and fails to select the right starting line-up or make the correct substitutions as required! If you look at things objectively… can you tell me how Newcastle has ended up with a far better squad than arsenal? Even Everton now…arguably has several better players than us in many positions…Such a decline was previously unthinkable. They haven’t spent crazy money have they? They’ve just spent better….Newcastle & Everton have players that we should be poaching… Ba, Cisse, Tiote, Coloccini, Ben Arfa, Krul .. Distin, Jagielka, Baines, Fellaini… Read more »


Stan koronke $ love f”””k the club

Willy young

We are simply competing for 4th vs Spuds Everton and maybe Newcastle. Should take Capital cup very seriously as no chance in the EPL or CL

There are so many players not good enough it is better to think of the few who are ( 4-5 )

I really think the club needs a new direction and Wenger has to go please at end of season.

Vermalen has become a liability

Seriously boring in the league not even having hope of beating a proper team


We’d be damn lucky to get fourth, with Santos and Ramsey and Vermaelen in our starting lineup. (That’s being generous.)


O an starting to believe that our best team at the moment is the one on the bench not the one with overrated egos who cant pass the ball forward. I know I may differ with many on this, to me Jeckinson is far much better than the unfit Sagna. The central striking rebel Theo is better than every striker we have, Arshavin can move forward better than Podolski, whike Meade can do better than Santos.

damien joyce

You know, I remember a few years ago, every weekend, all i cared about was Arsenal result, most of the time I’d look for utd result too but presumed whoever won the 2nd match between us would probably win the title, now all i seem to do is look at spuds/mugsmashers/newcastle even everton results atop of citeh and chavs now hoping that they might just be as shit as we are, I rarely enjoy a weekend/midweek these days and it is mainly because we have failed momentously to strengthen our team year in year out for last 8 years. I’ll… Read more »

Red & White Stripey Socks

Again a few results went our way! But fuck we need to pull our head out or our Arses!
We are the ARSENAL!


What’s angering me is the sheer lack of threat we seem to provide in the final third. A significant chunk of our possession comes from pinging the ball around between the defence and Arteta or pinging the ball from side to side just outside the opposition penalty box. Whatever happened to taking players on, skilling your opponent and bringing the forward into play? There’s been a change in team mentality and I don’t like it.


It’s been like that for YEARS.
The difference yesterday was obvious. Manure got the ball out of defence and attacked quickly, using width, and then focussing on goal. Visualise an arrowhead or an inverted triangle with a real focal point
Arsenal passed the ball around the back, allowed the opposition defence to get organised and then tried to attack using a blunt rectangular shape.
I was hoping the introduction of Walcott would give us an attacking point but methinks it was too late.


Shit keeper

Sagna. Koscielny. Mert. Clichy




Walcott. Rvp. Nasri.

Gazidis, board, Stan, Arsene out.


That would be our first eleven if we weren’t run by cheap ass wankers. We could win the treble with that team. No bullshit. What the fuck happened to the club I love?


yeah, bring back ‘world class’ clichy, that will solve all our problems …..


Shit keeper? Mannone had a great game today.


All of our keepers have been shit since mad Jens. Szcz has potential, Chelsea has cech, citeh have hart , spuds have lloris and Friedal. Clichy is a better lb than santos and Gibbs as he is today.



What are you talking about?


santos – acute flaccid paralysis
podolski- absence seizure
giroud- potts disease
ramsey- erm .. fragile x
sagna- hyperreactive malaria syndrome
wenger- congenital deafness. ?alports syndrome R/O autism


i lolled at damn near every one of these



Wenger (over past seven years), 1 out of 10

In a word: impotent


i’m sick of losing to that lot

every fucking year its the same

they always seem to adapt their tactics and team to easily beat us, why the fuck cant we approach them with a different strategy?
how can their players be so organised and not make defensive mistakes?
we need to practice defending and being solid, over and over again.
i dont care if its boring, its a lot more boring to keep losing

its embarrassing to be beaten so easily by them , time and again

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