Saturday, May 25, 2024

Chamakh departs for Crystal Palace

Marouane Chamakh has joined Crystal Palace on a free transfer.

The former Moroccan striker will team up with Ian Holloway’s men on a permanent basis, signing a 1 year deal according to Sky Sports.

The ex-Bordeaux man arrived in the summer of 2010 on a free transfer, and caught the eye with some impressive, hard-working performances in the absence of an injured Robin van Persie.

However, the Dutch Skunk turned out to be Samson’s hair for Chamakh. When he returned, Chamakh’s career took a downward plunge, not entirely helped by his fondness for nightlife, smoking shisha and hanging out in the seedy Twister clubs around Soho.

He missed a substantial period of one season having put out his back trying to do ‘Right hand yellow’.

A loan move to West Ham last January was a total disaster, he didn’t make a single appearance after January 31st, and his chances at re-establishing himself at Arsenal were absolutely minimal.

Now he’s gone and while you might miss him like a nice, crusty scab you enjoying picking, you know you’re better off without.

He becomes the 11th senior player out the door this summer after Andrei Arshavin, Sebastian Squillaci, Denilson, Johan Djourou, Andre Santos, Vito Mannone, Francis Coquelin, Ignasi Miquel and Gervinho.

Quite the cull. We said cull.


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Wise One

Hip Hip Hip…



It doesn’t even make sense, though they probably have curry in Morocco. I would think. My coat please.


suk my dick u cunt

Koss the Boss

—— Mannone —–

Squillaci – Djourou – Miquel – Santos

——— Denilson — Coquelin ——–

Gervinho – Conor Henderson – Arshavin

————- Chamakh ———

Nice team for Capital One Cup, right?


Substitutes: Shea, Meade, Angha, Eastmond, Aneke, Watt, Campbell


Is anyone else secretly hoping Bendtner stays and pushes on?

He’s a decent player… certainly better than our U21s.


I believe that if there is any chance, AW would have considered. But i think his feet are too big for his own shoes.


I wish I could say I will remember him fondly for doing well those 2 months the Dutch Skunk was out…but, alas, I’ll remember him instead for being yet another massive drain on the wage bill. Good riddance.

I want to boff Giroud and I'm not even gay

Notice how the whole club being in a foreign country doesn’t stop players being sold, but seems to stop anyone being bought?

A N Other

How many left in the squad now? Do we have enough to field 11 players?


“Arsenal ‘see off Chelsea to agree £14m deal for Bayern Munich star Luiz Gustavo’
Arsenal are believed to have agreed a £14m deal to sign Bayern Munich’s Luiz Gustavo.”

source: metro UK (+Austrian, Portugese media)

I am probably just dreaming, but there is a slight chance that we will have at least 12 players next week.


Sounded great until I saw metro as the source, still we have just beaten Man City 3-1 so we don’t need to sign anybody, hurray!

with the left and the right

After the summer that we’ve just had (and are still having) with transfer rumors, do you really think its wise to be trusting media reports?

wobbly ankles

The first time I read it I thought it said “Arsenal agree 14m to see Chelsea sign Luiz Gustavo.”

Really wasn’t that surprised by it either.




after the “we sign Higauin on friday” , i will wait for that one

Gutbukkit Deffrolla

You fell into the Press trap.

“Higuain to sign on Friday”

“Bernard to have medical on Friday”

“Luis Gustavo to sign”

See, this must be true because they didn’t say Friday. They always say Friday when they are lying because the type of people who read their paper on Friday will have forgotten the story by Monday, so won’t think the reporter is a wanker if it didn’t happen.


That list looks like a decent COC squad. Are we not participating in COC anymore or will just field our U21 side?

Insane Wanker

Bye bye Chamakh, hope you get all the shisha at Crystal Palace. Does anyone know approxiamately we’ve got on our wage bill with all these exits?


Considering that so far around 130 players left us I would say 30mil per week.

Danish Gooner

Up to 650000 a week.Now we only need to get rid of the greatest footballer that have ever lived.

Remember the invincibles because we aren't good anymore

And park

Gutbukkit Deffrolla

No, we should keep Park. He knows about Asia and stuff. Gazidis loves Asia and stuff.

Anyway, he’d be Like A Fucking Miracle if he played a few games for us this season and scored double figures in the league.


Aint goin’ nowhere, bwahahaha!


That would mean we will end up saving 30m Euros this year on just wages. Sign Messi!!!

Edu's Braces

That picture is so disturbing


With that neck Chamakh could see no future at Arsenal. I would too!




why? because he’s not good enough to play for a top 4(ish) premier league team and agreed to be paid a lot of money? take a deep breath and calm down.


This has to be the best PhotoShop ever.

Longman Shortman



Terrible news am i right friends?


Eh? Folks saying we a “threadbare” after all these squad departures? Come on. Last season AW never played these guys anyway, save a few COC games. All this “cull” has done is save us a lot of quid. I’m happy about it. Not happy about not signing anyone else, but hey, you can’t have it all, right?



Rad Carrot

Jesus it’s scary how few senior players we have left. I mean, it’s good that we’ve got rid of them and everything, but we really need some reinforcements.

I’m just terrified that le prof is going to try and make it through the season with what we’ve got, based on what he believes the FFP rules are regarding total club spend on wages. Then, when we finish seventh, he’ll start complaining to the FA about all the teams that finished above us, and be roundly ignored as usual.


FFP is a complete and utter joke


ohh yeh i almost forgot FFP even existed.

My god how much have City spent this transfer window??

And we still tear them a new one.

Sweaty Testicles/Scrotum

FFP is not a joke. COntrary to what most peopel think, FFP is not meant to ‘level the playing field.’

It is meant simply to makes sure that clubs use money they actually have and stay in the black, financially speaking.


But City has never turned a profit and they still spend hundreds of millions of pounds per transfer window.

Gutbukkit Deffrolla

Yeah, but now their cousin’s wife’s brother is giving them 400 million pounds in sponsorship.
That is money they make, so they can buy anybody they want for as much as they want and still be OK under FFP.

Jesus Navas

Don’t know why you’re telling me that. Especially after that game…


I know this is kind of ludicrous but I can’t help but look at some of those departures such as Djourou, Coquelin and Gervinho and feel like we have have made a mistake in letting them go. If we had replaced them with better players then of course I wouldn’t feel that way but at the moment I feel our squad is weakened by their departures. I feel so down and bleak about the up-coming season and its a far cry from when the transfer window opened and I was full of hope. Maybe in a few weeks everything I… Read more »


Of these only Coq didn’t make you think “oh fuck” when you saw them standing on the sidelines waiting to be subbed in. The squad that Wenger actually used last year is still there. All things considered you have to say the club have done well to clear the decks. I predict that by September you’ll get 2 cheapos in (what’s up that Perez playing in City game?), one 15m-ish player, and that they’ll still buy someone ridiculously expensive, Suarez or Rooney. The latter’s wages are ridiculous, but surely all the deadwood leaving can cover them. My more paranoid side… Read more »

petits handbag

Am i the only one watching us spank nan city?


Nope, I was watching too. 3-1 is awesome. Would have been sweet if Kos had stopped Negredo on that long ball. Negredo is the only one of City’s new signings who looked any good. Jesus Navas (bought for about 22m I think) is the Spanish Adam Johnson, and he will probably challenge Bale and Suarez for the Premier League diving championship. Fernandinho (20m pounds I think) is simply a lightweight; he’s just not a good player. Jovetic didn’t get much time, but I never really rated him anyway. Nasri is already past his prime, which is hilarious because I think… Read more »


Right because as everyoneknows it’s possible to judge the outcome of the season and the quality of the players Man City bought based on a preseason game. Sheesh.

Man City bought quality, four top players this summer. If you had ever watched other leagues, you’d know.

Arshavin's Dietician

How many times did you ACTUALLY watch a Brazilian league game last year?


Fernandinho is not that good, certainly not worth what they paid for him. Jovetic is OK, Navas is very quick but he’ll have to cut out the floppy divey shit if he wants to succeed. Oh yeah, he’s also clinically depressed with homesickness: good luck adjusting to miserable rainy Manchester (from what I’ve been told. I’m Canadian and I’ve never been to Manchester, but the way Tevez, Robinho and Balotelli describe it, you’d think it was hell on Earth). Chilean Wenger has these guys playing Wenger ball (lots of possession, quick passing, not many longballs, negligent defending), which is going… Read more »


I’m not sure if the “watched other leagues crack” was directed at me, but Fernandinho played in Ukraine last season, not the Brazilian league.

Either way, he’s worth nowhere near what they paid for him. Lightwieght and profligate in possession. An upgrade to Gareth Barry, but who isn’t?


Gone on a free transfer allowing palace to put all their money to wages and not into a transfer fee too. Why can’t we do this with bendtner? Or if we’re lucky he will come back as the greatest striker mk2

petits handbag

Yes Nan city, because they play like old women not because I can’t use predict text

ghana gunner

we are winning by a margin I am uncomfortable with. I really hate Wenger feeling any sort of vindication from this match.


“We are winning by a margin I am uncomfortable with.”

Thus speaks a true fan…


Wow we have managed to get rid of a whole team worth of deadwood. And still no transfers coming in.


It’s a ploy by Man City to trick Wenger into thinking that our squad is up to the task and therefore does not require improving. Clever.

Dial square

We put those cunts in their place, new signings?? Fuck it, let’s go with what we’ve got….COYG

Merlin's Panini

Never really worked out for him after he lost his mojo did it? He’s a very limited player and for a brief period was very limited but effective. He just didn’t really have it in him to compete. I wonder how he’ll fair at Palace. Poor sods, they gave us Ian Wright and we belatedly gave them Chamakh in return.

Midfield Corporal

I think this deal is belated payback for Eddie McGoldrick.


Finally. Park’s contract should be terminated too and Bendtner must leave as well. We finally have no more useless players. The wages we have freed up are enough to afford 3 top class players.


We should be able to afford top players without losing literally every one of our almost-decent substitutes.

Gervinho and Chamakh are shit but they’re better than a 19 year old who will spend the very peak of his career at Leeds, simple as.




well, the thumbs down was for including ramsey


He’s not white
He’s not black
He comes from a place not far from Iraq
He plays up front and he plays in attack
He’s our ma.. Oh..


Morocco is incredibly far away from Iraq.

Gutbukkit Deffrolla

Party Pooper!!

It’s only two bloody inches away. Iraq is red coloured in my Atlas. What’s two inches in these newfangled centimetre things?


Two things – you missed a trick by not photoshopping a longer neck onto the photo and you got CUNTS name wrong on the article

arsene nose

i cant believe it but to me ramsey was mom today, up till now he has been total crap but fair play pre-season he and grioud another donkey looked really good, so in a way thats 2 new players… as other posters have said, bring in a few quality players and we could have a right go


Rambo has been good for ages.

These stupid comments really need to die out.

He was never even a bad player before his injury he was banging them in playing very well.

He struggled for a while cause of a “broken Leg” to push back not because of lack of quality.


What we should be asking ourselves is …..if Wenger is such a great and wonderful manager….what THE FUCK….did he ever see in shite like Chamakh, Santos and Gervinho to bring them to our club and strangle our resources. Wenger should get the blame, not these awful players, who with respect to them, were never good enough…..and what player would turn down the chance to come to Arsenal?
Wenger out.

gooner odst

That reject from Juventus we got for £10 mill at the time turned out pretty decent. Although the less said about van cunt, the better.

the Only One

they were great @ their clubs at the time…

Ol' Big Bear

@petits handbag – I think if there was a club called Nan City Wayne Rooney would sign for them in a heartbeat.


Chamakh has left and a sheesha bar at drayton park just closed down for “maintanance” coincidence?

Brenda Rogers

I think not.


Should have done b better in heading considering the length of his neck (pic)


Should have done b better on heading considering the length of his neck (pic)


Hehe, the neck’s longer than the deal he signed.


Chamack to hit a double against spuds on opening day. it would be poetic. or a fairytale.


Is that a starting 11 for a League Cup game?


Thats the last of them lot. Oh, I forgot, there is still that slacker left…TGSTEL. Someone need to come up with a patent of an idea to get him off and out 🙂

Rectum Spectrum

We surely have shaved ~£350k/week off the wage bill already. Considering we’ve got the most lucrative annual shirt fee in the prem and a tidy increase on the manufacturer deal too we must be fucking rolling in it now. Like seriously fucking set. Blogs has made his case about suarez and I agree. But if its a transfer wenger is wanting then just go to £50m tomorrow and get it fucking done. What a signal to send to the other targets who must know they are wanted by arsenal by now.

Rectum Spectrum

Oh god. After considering my last post I just got a mental image of gazidis squating down with his trousers round his ankles masterbating furiously over printed out financial spreadsheets. Ugh. He’s thrown his tie over his shoulder to keep it out of the way.

Paint that one Jim.

Amazing clear out. What we all wanted. Shame no one came in.

And the one turd left that won’t flush? Bendtknob!!!!!!


2 players coming in for sure! has to be


Squilacci and Arshavin’s contracts ran out. Gervinho and Mannone were sold at a loss. Denilson and Santos were paid off. Djourou, Miquel and Coquelin are on loan meaning we are paying them to play for someone else.
So yes we have more money to pay wages than before but we are still bleeding too much . Bendtner and Park are still drinking from the trough too. That’s why Arsene must buy quality now , not raid the bargain bins again. Fingers crossed 🙂

the Only One

I wish him luck…..fuck van persie..he did this to chamahk.


I don’t want to be the turd in the punch bowl, but both Arsenal and Crystal Palace’s official websites have no news on this story.

Naija Gunner

Hilarious comments! Laughed through out while reading them.

I love Arsenal FC and her fans 😀


testing the new avatar


Marouane literally looks like he’s out of puff from all the shisha in this article’s first photo.

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