Despite the fact he’d probably not rather talk about it publicly, knowing that fans really don’t want to hear it anyway, an Arsenal player has spoken about the opening day defeat to West Ham.
Pressed into post-game media action by the relentless desire for content regardless of its merit, the player gave stock responses to questions everybody already knows the answers to.
Expressing disappointment at the performance and the result, the player in question, dying inside a little bit because he’s not stupid like, talked of learning lessons and bouncing back.
On top of that, while keen to make the point that they couldn’t blame anyone but themselves for the loss, he stressed the need to ‘work hard’ and get the right result in the next game.
It provided fans with fresh insight into the minds of the squad after a bad result, and is certainly not simply a repeat of countless other interviews in similar circumstances.
‘Thank goodness I was able to provide supporters with an explanation for that terrible display, I’m sure they’ll really appreciate it’, he didn’t think for one second as he made his way mournfully to the showers.