Happy Birthday to Arseblog News

In all the confusion and outright panic which accompanied Arseblog’s decision to take a holiday to Barcelona, it appears we neglected to mention that Arseblog News celebrated its first birthday on Friday.

Looking back through the archive, it’s somewhat unnerving to note that twelve months ago we were reporting on Denilson and Bendtner declaring their desire to leave Arsenal, influential players stalling over contract negotiations, supporters pulling their hair out about the lack of new signings and our club captain being linked with a move elsewhere…

Hmm. Oh well.

There has of course been a fair bit betwixt the end of one silly season and the start of another…much of it shredding our nerves along the way. It’s fair to say that the low of selling Nasri and Fabregas, combined with the hammering at Old Trafford, had Gooners around the world reaching for razor blades with suicidal thoughts threatening to nip our burgeoning readership in the bud before we’d reached September. Thankfully though, despite the intense lows of those first two months, we’ve also been treated to a selection of unforgettable highs.

Robin’s hattrick at Stamford Bridge provided the first glimpse of a red and white rainbow after the most turbulent of shitstorms, while the 125 anniversary celebrations, Henry’s goalscoring return, the comeback against Spurs, near-miracle turnaround versus Milan, and topsy-turvy last day win against West Brom will also live long in the memory.

Cheers to everyone who has shared those moments with us since last June and for chewing the cud (and calling Nasri a cunt) in the comment section…it’s been great fun. We suggest you treat yourselves to a drink or two.

Without further ado, here’s a few birthday statistics*

1,134 – Arseblog News posts in total
372 – number of days since Arseblog News launched
3.04 – average number of posts per day
98,796 – number of adverts displayed trying to get you to hook up with women via dating sites
3 –  Elderly Arsenal fans who are now wed to young Russian women
499 – posts by @Arseblog
496 – posts by @AAllenSport
63 – posts by @JeorgeBird
47 – posts by @7amkickoff
15 – posts by Sul
14 – posts by others
23 – voicemail messages from Sebastien Squillaci asking for work experience
62, 526 – comments in total
56,424 – comments adhering to comment policy
33,876 – times Nasri has been called a cunt in comments
13 – trolling Spurs fans who had their gap well and truly filled
16, 594 – followers of the @ArseblogNews Twitter account
3,487 – times people have swooned at our bespoke “p1r.es” Twitter link shortener
37 – days since Arseblog News launched in China
131 – posts tagged ‘injury’ news
80 – per cent of ‘injury’ posts relating to Abou Diaby
3 – times Nicklas Bendtner’s trousers fell down due to his drinks being spiked
10 – point gap which that fuckwit Harry Redknapp beautifully squandered
7 – Arsecast Daily edition podcasts (shelved due to time constraints)
2 – incredibly helpful Gooners in @SiuFay and @RYO_cleverfish who scour the web for Arsenal stories
0 – times it has been suggested that Denilson has been missed
2 – goals scored by Ju Young Park and Marouane Chamakh for Arsenal since Arseblog News launched
38 – Premier League games in which we’ve been thankful for Robin van Persie
17 – jokes made at the expense of Andre Santos’ ‘gays’ tweet**
128,903 – transfer rumours ignored by Arseblog News since May 2012

*Statistics correct, where not made up, as of today
** per hour