Sunday, February 25, 2024

Knock-kneed striker reveals Wenger hotel surprise

For one reason or another some strikers never live up to expectations. Perhaps they’re burdened by a ridiculous transfer price or follow in the hallowed footsteps of a legend, possibly they’re signed by accident following a prank phonecall or maybe, as is often the case, they’re just a bit pants.

So how do you keep the hopes and dreams of transfer starved supporters in check?

You do as Yaya Sanogo keeps doing and repeatedly tell everyone your knees are shot. Clever lad. Set expectations so low that you can’t fail to exceed them…we see what you’re doing you cheeky scamp.

Speaking to France Football (translation by Sky Sports) about his yet to be officially confirmed move to the Emirates, the 20-year-old Auxerre attacker reflected on an 18-month spell on the sidelines confirming he’d given serious consideration to quitting football prior to Arsenal’s interest.

“I wanted to stop [playing]. I told myself it was useless to go on and to imperil my health.

“I could not run any longer. I had too much pain, the doctors didn’t know what to do. But, one day I went for a jog and step by step I made my way back.”

As we all know, Arsene Wenger isn’t one to be put off a footballer easily. Got a clubfoot? He’ll sort you a special boot deal. Scurvy? He’ll plant an orange grove at London Colney. Rickets? He’ll get you a wet nurse. Bad hair? He’ll just say he hasn’t seen it. Military service? He’ll send Dick ‘5 languages’ Law wherever is necessary.

Anyway, we digress.

What’s clear is that Wenger was obviously keen on Sanogo despite his injury record and went so far as to make the player a surprise visit in a Paris hotel room. We’re not sure why it had to be a surprise, or in a hotel room, but the boss has his ways…

“Gilles Grimandi [Arsenal scout] came to see me from time to time at Auxerre too,” continued Sanogo.

“One day he called me for a meeting in a Paris hotel and Arsene Wenger was there. I was very impressed.

“Wenger told me I would get opportunities and reassured me about my injury. He told me he had followed me for years. That meeting was very important and today I am an Arsenal player.

“I am 20, I had not played for a year and a half, I had scored some goals and Arsenal had contacted me. Could I really say no? I don’t believe so. It will be a magnificent adventure.”

Best of luck to him, it’ll be curious to see how his Arsenal career pans out. It would be a decent start if the club actually announced the deal.

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Arshavin's Dietician

That’s not funny


The most Official Unofficial Arsenal signing in a long time. Welcome aboard!


Anelka was like Bambi on ice when he first arrived. Maybe Sonogo will be the same without arsehole brother for an agent and bad moods.

His knees cant be that bad can they……?


We haven’t had a player like him since Diaby!

Oh, wait… We still have Diaby.

Anyway, he’s obviously a gamble, and it’s not like we’ll have to rely on him in the near future. We’re well-stocked for strikers…if Higgy comes!

Bodom After Midnight

I’m sorry but i’m not optimistic about this one. Feels like more deadwood. Let’s hope he is low wages so we can shift him when we want.

Dr Baptiste

Is this what it’s come to, labeling players people don’t know much about (Football Manager doesn’t count) as deadwood before they’ve even been confirmed as signed for us?

Arsene's left nipple piercing

Really like the scurvy joke.

arteta's perfect hair

I have seen his goals for france under 19s or 20s and for auxerre and they are absolutely smashing. That guy has some real power with a lot of skill, exactly like diaby, and is injury prone like him too

Yankee Gooner

Sanogo is our best signing of the summer yet!

Arshavin's Dietician

So much pessimism, give the boy a chance.

Obviously the strike force will be as follows:

1. Higuain 2. Giroud 3. Podolski 4. Sanogo

With Bendtner, Chamakh & Park being moved on/loaned out.

Walcott & Gervinho don’t cut it as the lone striker


Jesus christ.

Now take giroud out and put aguero instead, and you get my fm11 strikeforce as it was 2 years ago.

Sometimes I amaze myself. Such a visionary!


arrghh. I forgot that I had a certain Van persie included there as well. Still pretty close.


I had Theo Walcott in Fifa a season before Arsenal signed him. (Sorry, just couldn’t help myself. :P)


In a slight departure from the norm, this lad’s officially LANStastic. That is:

Like A New Signing That Ain’t Signed Till It’s Confirmed.

God, summer’s boring.

Arshavin's Dietician

Kudos on the acronym


Brilliant clubfoot gag!

the only sam is nelson

it’s not official yet?

perhaps new chair sir chips phoned dick law and said “it’s a no go”

*gets coat*


“wake him up, it’s a no go,

he won’t be wearing… that arsenal logo”


Another Diaby! He’ll hardly play and we’ll be stuck paying his wages for four years.

We have seventy million in the bank, why are we wasting it on another injury probe nobody.

Massive club, small time Manager.

probe nobody

I agree, seventy million seems steep.

Long Dong Silver

Yeah, and who needs prospects when you have a warchest? What even is the future? Why build for it?


Don’t be silly. The future isn’t real, just classic propaganda. Wenger/Ivan/Stan/tealady out!!


I also agree that we should not injury probe nobody, ever.


An injury probe? Sounds painful.

Too Drunk To Be Offside

WTF with the pessimism … the FIRST SIGNING OF THE SUMMER, WELCOME !!


“Don’t even think about it, Say No Go”


Ha ha ha OOhhh to be 80’s again, have a green tick for putting that Hall & Oates tune back in my head!.


You know we are only looking for the kid to develop and contribute when called upon.
You think some of the clowns above could recognize that and welcome him aboard. Its not a 20 mill gamble he proved he was coming good last season and if used in the right way im sure can chip and help the team out.

Fuck the diabi jokes its getting boring …..


If we sign him or not the headline could be


best of luck to YAYA SANOGO

Alan Sunderland's Afro

wake me up before Sanogo.


Sanogo’s contract should be one year performance based. He should receive 2k a week base salary then be paid game by game there after.

Merlin's Panini

One year? So he could potentially play really well and then leave for free to a rival? That’s not smart. You have to take risks to succeed sometimes and he’s just young enough that his body still has time to get stronger.


Sanogo will actually be A New Signing when he will be finally officially.


We are going to sign him twice to make it look like we are busy in the market, unofficial and official!


No one actually focused on the main point of this article: Wenger surprising a young player in his Hotel Room. Sounds disturbing.


I don’t get it?

Songs of Praise: 'God, is that you?'

The Sugar tweet so sweet,
And pub-appointed Pardew’s teat,
Swept my atheism off its feet.

Higuain and Fellaini please.


seriously don’t mind a gamble on a free that we can probably lock up for three years

Mikel Artekkers

Let’s see… young, French, Ligue 2, injury prone, on the cheap. I think I speak for us all when I say “please don’t be Diaby 2.0.” Standard Wenger signing though, but a signing is a signing so hey.


Correct me if I’m wrong but isn’t the old Wenger buying duff injury prone players absolute bollocks? Diaby, Ramsey, and Eduardo all sustained injuries from horror tackles where as Tommy had no history of injuries at Dortmund. I could, on the other hand, mention a certain Marc Overmars who was pretty much told he may never play again before joining Arsenal. He turned out OK if I remember rightly


i was expecting a celebratory piece on Stuart Pearce not being the U-21 England coach anymore. surely we need one to congratulate the FA in having common sense

not a proffesional footballer

Arsenal will never come meet me and talk contracts to me.
Wenger will never meet me and reassures me of my footballing future.

Anyway, good luck to him, I really hope he does well. He kinda looks like a striker Diaby though.
Hopefully his injuries could be mended well

Jacques DeCock

“One day he called me for a meeting in a Paris hotel and Arsene Wenger was there. I was very impressed.”

Oh, my dirty, dirty mind lol


Welcome to the club Sanogo!

Can’t see you breaking into the 1st team any time soon to displace Giroud or (Villa / Higuain)
But looking forward to seeing you in the League cup sometime soon

[…] 来源:[Arseblog News] […]

Santhosh Gopal

Obviously you hope he doesnt get injured again. Also hope we are in for signings who would immediately help the team.

omosh wenger

it seems they are spending the 70million as promised


Rickets? He’ll get you a wet nurse.

Should be “horny?” instead of “rickets?” 🙂

Judgement day (once more)

I really like these kind of signings! Sure, it´s a gamble, but if AW turns out to be right we will have a young, cheap, talented and LOYAL player. I know loyalty means fuck all these days, but hopefully this bloke will pay back by signing a long ass contract.

However, I would really like to see a couple of proper signings as well!

[…] We could talk a little bit about Yaya Sanogo, the Arsenal player who isn’t officially an Arsenal player yet but keeps talking about being an Arsenal player and how much the contact with Arsene Wenger made the difference. He revealed that the Grimster had been in touch with him and then: […]


Let’s hope for both our sakes this kid stays injury free and fulfils his potential. I would hate to endure another Diaby.


Good luck to you kid. Now where’s that marquee signing at???


So march month another deciding factor in our lady arsenal’s season


Yeah March will be huge but from March till seasons end is massive for everyone. Spurs , ECL qualifiers and the International break make for a mixed bag start. Over all though we have a very reasonable schedule. No excuse for us not to be up with the leaders all season.


Play him as a 70th minute sub against lower league teams and in the league cup. he should score 15 goals by Christmas then we can hock him off to PSG for twenty mill in January.

Trex d Gunner

Arsene knows best. No more dead woods though, we need proven quality.


Any chance we’ve signed Messi and are ‘are just waiting for July’ to make the announcement?


Strange on my computer theres no comments here on my phone theres many?


Even more strange when i sent my post suddenly the comments appear.

Lucas Felipe

this is a great signing for Wenger?


its a strange world, jason

Dr Baptiste

This is such a nothing story that there appear to be no comments, that or my system refuses to show them…..

Dr Baptiste

And now it’s shown them….. I look a little mental now

[…] 今天在这里谈点有关萨诺戈的事,一位还未官方成为阿森纳球员的阿森纳球员却一直在谈论他成为阿森纳球员的经历以及与温格的接触对他选择加盟阿森纳起到了多么关键的作用。萨诺戈强调格里曼迪(阿森纳球探)已经与他联系过了,此后: […]


I have glimpsed his goals for France under 19s or 20s and for auxerre and they are wholeheartedly shattering. Now take giroud out and put aguero rather than, and you get my fm11 strikeforce as it was 2 years ago. Thumps up

vps hosting in jaipur

Let’s hope for both our sakes these guys resides injury free and fullfil his potential. Thanks for sharing this.

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