Arsenal scored another comprehensive pre-season win with a 7-1 win over Vietnam in the sweltering heat this afternoon. Arsene Wenger started with an XI of:
Szczesny – Jenkinson – Sagna – Koscielny – Gibbs – Arteta – Rosicky – Oxlade-Chamberlain – Gnabry – Podolski – Giroud
And the Gunners took an early lead when Giroud twatted home a delicious Rosicky pass in the 5th minute, and the Frenchman almost double the lead, and his tally, when he wombatted a 30 yard fizzer just wide of the post.
Vietnam looked better than Indonesia but that’s a bit like saying a shaven scrotum looks better than one with some gnarled, crusty pubes on it. One of their blokes spannered a shot wide in the 27th minute but Szczesny remained untroubled.
Shortly afterwards Lukas Podolski bamboozled his way through the Vietnam defence, but was so impressive Giroud was standing in quiet admiration rather than anticipating the pass which would have given him a tap-in.
Bacary Sagna head-bashed away a Vietnam free kick before getting in a good foot-cruncher as the home side found some space behind the Arsenal defence. Another one of their blokes glubbered a shot from distance over bar before Mikel Arteta returned the favour with a 30 yard free kick.
Lukas Podolski then seal-clubbed a shot against the post and Vietnam keeper, Duong Hong Son, made a smart save from Serge Gnabry’s rebound effort.
Just before half-time Giroud doubled Arsenal’s lead, running on to a poor Vietnam clearance and flibnobbing a first time shot just inside the post. And just moments later the HFB made it 3-0 after a great Oxlade-Chamberlain pass put him through on goal and he deftly tallywhacked it over the keeper and into the net.
Arsenal made a raft of changes at half-time and got the second half off to a great start when Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain made it 4-0, latching onto a Walcott pass and cribswobbling home for his first goal of pre-season.
Chuba Akpom scored twice in couple of minutes to make it 5, then 6-0, the youngster taking his goal tally for the tour to three, and fellow strapling Gedion Zelalem catching the eye with some sumptuous passing.
Jack Wilshere was brought on for his first action of pre-season as Arsene Wenger also gave run-outs to Olsson, Aneke, keeper Damian Martinez.
Ignasi Miquel, linked today with a move to Real Sociedad, mashed home Arsenal’s 7th in the 75th minute, before the home side got a rather fortuitous goal which was greeted with rapturous applause by the home crowd.
Martinez was forced into a great save, finger-snatching away a powerful Vietnam free kick which was swerving like a Twitter ITK called out on their bullshit.
Vietnam then had their goalkeeper sent off for handling the ball outside the area, with one of the outfield players grabbing the gloves and going in nets like a schoolyard game. Why the ref couldn’t have left him on with just 2 minutes to go is a good question, but, you know, refs.
There was a slight worry as Aaron Ramsey left the pitch before the final whistle, hopefully nothing serious.
The game finished in a tropical rainstorm, but the sun was shining in Arsenal hearts as appalling metaphors concluded this report.