Thursday, June 13, 2024

Arsenal 1-0 Sp*rs: player ratings

They spent a fortune. We, like an old man with bladder problems, haven’t been able to spend a penny. Yet the derby ended up with a classic 1-0 Arsenal win.

Here’s how the players rated.

Wojciech Szczesny: 8/10 – Definitely not the busiest of the two keepers but pulled off an outstanding save in the second half to keep Arsenal ahead. Another very good performance, repaying the manager’s faith in him.

Carl Jenkinson: 7/10 – Struggled a bit with Chadli at first, but then the tables turned and he grew into the game.

Per Mertesacker: 8/10 – My favourite footballing ent. Look at this and tell me you don’t love him.

Laurent Koscielny: 8/10 – Quick, aggressive, snapped into tackles, made Soldado look about £25m too expensive.

Kieran Gibbs: 7/10 – Townsend was Sp*rs most effective attacking player, and a handful, but Gibbsy did well and got forward well. Needs to watch that sideways pass into danger though.

Jack Wilshere: 7/10 – Played through a stomach problem, had to go off to have a poo. When nature calls …

Aaron Ramsey: 8/10 – Passing was a little bit off today but without this man our start to the season would have been more difficult. He’d run through walls for the shirt and worked his hole off all day.

Santi Cazorla: 7/10 – Unlucky not to score with either of his free kicks and a little careless in possession at times, but good stuff as always.

Tomas Rosicky: 7/10 – Chased them all over the pitch, got a yellow card for nothing because fouling Spuds should get you a medal not a yellow card.

Theo Walcott: 7/10 – Fine assist for the Giroud goal, could have been a bit more involved defensively but that was a vital assist.

Olivier Giroud: 9/10 – A quite brilliant finish for the goal, making it 4 in 5 games, but the guy was colossal all day long. Won headers, held it up well, and put in a magnificent defensive shift. Man of the match by some margin.


Mathieu Flamini: 7/10 – Welcome home! His signing might have been convenient but it was also very handy. Replaced Wilshere, came on and bashed one of their players with his first touch, winning us a free kick in the process. Organised, shouted, Flaminied.

Nacho Monreal: 7/10 – Came on to shore things up. Shored things up.

Bacary Sagna: 7/10 – Not really on long enough to rate but we’re giving him a 7 anyway because we love him and because Sp*rs are shitbiscuits.

Bonus rating: Sp*rs 10/10 – their misery is so delicious.

Feel free to debate and discuss in the comments, but please read the comment policy first and don’t get angry with each other, or me, about imaginary points.

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COYG !!! No player get below 7.


Giroud was fantastic. I know we need another striker for back-up, but I also don’t think Giroud deserves to be on the bench.


I love Giroud’s effort but he just isn’t world class. We need a world class striker!

He is still a brilliant striker to have in the squad still


Yeah, a world class striker, like Soldado.


You mean Solar Panel? Could have seen Levys face.


just spat my water out reading solar panel, great derby day and nothing like browsing arseblog comments for a nightcap

Parisian Weetabix

*cough* A world class striker is a striker who can play in a completely even game and produce the one moment of sheer, magical class that brings the 3 points home with his team. Who puts in a man of the match performance in the biggest game. Who bullies defenders, holds up play, beats his man to set his teammate up, plays defensive mid when everyone else has sold themselves, heads dangerous balls out of his own box, clears the ball off the fucking line to preserve the lead he gave his team. Giroud was unplayable today. Give him some… Read more »


Giroud was awesome today, definitely his best performance in an Arsenal shirt.

So it’s probably not the best time to make this point but if you’re being honest with yourself, do you really see Giroud as a long-term Arsenal striker?

Since Wenger, one thing we have been consistent with is World Class strikers.

Wright,Bergkamp,Henry,Van Persie…

Giroud? Sorry but I don’t think so

Red Cannon

@jimmyjames: I don’t think we can judge that after a single season. From what I’ve seen at the beginning of this season, I wouldn’t bet against him becoming a world class striker. He’s been composed, efficient, dangerous to defend against, & extraordinarily hard-working for a striker.

Dr Baptiste

It’s strange but I remember a time when Henry and van Persie weren’t world class strikers but Wenger coached them into that bracket…..


@Red Cannon:

Fair enough.

But I would not want us to risk another season just to find out how Giroud really is.

We have the money, we have 26 hours, please Arsene buy us a top top striker


One thing is; that the surrounding players could be better at picking up the knock downs from the balls giroud wins in the air. too many of them ended up with sp*rs today after total aerial domination by the handsome frenchman.


I for one do actually see Giroud as a long term hero. He shouldered a heavy burden last season considering expectations and got the job done. This year he’s consistently showing skills that we saw flashes of last year. He is the real deal and will only improve.


I gotta say, I’m so happy to see we have some players now with a bit of mean streak (Koscielny, Wilshere, Ramsey, Vermaelen when healthy and now Giroud). So far this year, I don’t see anybody pushing us around.

Lol me

Fuk you sp*rs


What an amazing Chicken Festival. Happy Chicken Festival to you all…

Me So Hornsey



Good to see Ches with a string of great performances under his belt. Should most certainly get bonus points for this:

Tiger Tadgh

This is why Wenger wanted Suarrez n not Higuain because he wants a dynamic striker that will not disrupt Giroud n play behind or wide! I can see NOW


I have always thought Higuain is just another Giroud but less powerful. We need a striker with another style. I still wonder why no one has looked at Kiessling. He is Bundesliga’s highest goal scorer last season. This guy scored 27 goals in 43 app last season and 4 out of 5 already this season.


Kießling is 30 already. And he isn’t all that, although he’s a great team player, lots of effort but technically not very good and he’s only suited for counter attacking teams which is why he has no chance with the national team.


I would have to disagree with you…. Kiesling was also had the most successful tackles in the bundesliga last year. For a forward, who also won the golden boot, or cannon or whatever the fuck they give over there, that is hugely impressive.


Chicarito could do a job. little pea could fit and how i’d love to see an ex manure player sticking em in for the cannon at old toilet.


Isn’t he very Walcott like? (i could do with another Theo as his form has been very good (and a little undervalued IMO), but do we need more of the same?)


I don’t think we need Chicharito but he is far from Walcott like. He’s a cold-blooded finisher, that’s it. Doesn’t really run with the ball much, doesn’t excel at hold up play, isn’t a great passer. He just scores goals, he’d be a lovely third option off the bench but I think we need a more well rounded player.

Red Cannon

I couldn’t agree with you more on this point.


Mesut Ozil 10/10?


Sky sources mate spent most of transfer window driving me crackers over Cesc to manure bollocks. Must admit I hope there right on this one because that boy is top top top quality.


Hope big Per is putting a good word in being former team mates and all that.

with the left and the right

if Mertesacker ever gets a statue it should be modeled after that half second after he tackles the ball and with his leg still outstretched surveys the field like a fucking admiral!

Casual Gooner

This team could be something special.

Hopefully Le Prof pulls a rabbit out of his raincoat and surprises us all tomorrow.

After backing our boys through the tough times, we deserve the euphoria that comes with an NLD victory!

Up the fucking Gunners!


Fair play to the team. We supporters (myself included) threw a lot of frustration these couple of weeks esp after the loss to Villa, in which we didn’t play too bad but Anthony Taylor demonstrated incompetence and corruption (he had a very bad refereeing performance this week too). The players could have suffered collateral damage but picked themselves up magnificiently. I think more than anything, the players deserve some amazing signings to bolster their confidence. This was one of the most spirited team performances I’ve seen for a while, and it wouldn’t be fair if Wenger expected them to perform… Read more »


I agree mate. The team really look like a unit these days. The man-hugging going on amongst the players was so great to see. I really want us to do well this season. I’ve softened my stance a little, before I was of the opinion that a couple of world class players would take us to the next level. I feel after the performances we’ve had since Villa that a couple of like for likes would probably do it. We need numbers Having said that, if we sign Ozil tomorrow/today (I’m in Australia) I would be over the moon and… Read more »

Deadline day goose bumps

Giroud’s link up play has become central to our attacking style.
love how the team plays to his strengths.

Ramsey is something else too,his tackling and dribbling–wooh!!!

I must reserve some praise for lloris,magnificent.

every time I watch that giroud goal on slow motion I get an orgasm.the way it just spins beautifully in.

ah.moments of Joy

who thought I had forgotten flamini’s flying tackles:-)



Good job boys for putting smiles on our faces and noisy neighbour in misery. Now that Gareth has joined RM, no one will Bale Sp*rs out of their misery.


On the topic of Bale joining Madrid, a commentator (Frowny Face) astutely noted on BBC Sports website:

“Finally, all this monkey business is concluded.”

Just thought I’d share the joy.


I heard they are all going bananas there in Madrid 😉


Or perhaps going ape as they home Bale feel at home.




Levy – 10.
For always making spurs just good enough to givr the spuds hope but keeping them shit enough so they never have a chance. He’s secretly a gooner.


Please confirm the Jack needed to poo part is true. Please?

I'm Szczesny and I know it

I heard he went off broken hearted because he went to poo but only farted. I’ll get my coat.


Very happy his poo was a success. Its been reporeted now that Jack forgot to flush, and when he ran back to correct his mistake his poo seemed flushed, and in the water was floating a check for 25 million pounds.

Daniel Levy to confirm ‘world-class midfield enforcer’ signing to cover for Capoue later today.


He had a Rotten Ham sandwich…it was revolting to his system…


..but how well-consolidated was it?


Thats what happens when you keep your shit together 🙂


Wenger clairified in the post-game interview that the confrontation of 11 utterly shitty players simply became too much for young Wilshere.


The Fans: 10/10

Swedish gooners are proud of you!


Can we please just get a few players, like those £20M players that Sp*rs have bought? There’s no denying that they would impove us. Perhaps even walk into our team.


My spelling leaves much to be desired today. Remember me, is there a “B” in “power shift in North London”?


I realise you were being ironic but in my euphoria filled ecstasy, I accidently gave you a thumbs down. I apologise.


I am taking this ironically. Thumbs up!


10/10 for Cazorla for taking down Capoue, who is 25 cm higher by the way, like a little bitch


Totally agree, didn’t know he had the Ankle Lock in his arsenal. This guy is amazeballs! COYG!!!


Looks like Capoue might have broken a leg which if true, no one should be celebrating, including us. We aren’t Stoke for fuck’s sake.

If its true and he has well and truly broken his leg, I wish Capoue well.


Look, Stoke players do it deliberately. We are nothing like Stoke, who celebrate intentional violence.

We can praise Cazorla’s bravery while still commiserating with Capoue.

Clock End Mike

Bacary Sagna: 7/10 … because we love him” So true, I approve!


……and ‘shitbiscuits’……..who could forget that little gem.

We have our problems but I’m just buzzing with this result. Interesting day ahead, so over to you Arsene………


I think the Rosicky one was the best…


flamini is definitely worth the £0 signing on fee, perhaps even a bit more

A Yank

Seriously, if we had dropped £20M on a player who came in and started organizing everybody and taking control of things, we’d all be losing our shit over what a great signing it was.

Wenger has usually taken the high road with departing players so that there are rarely bitter feelings between parties. It just so happened that paid off and saved us from spending double-digit millions on a player that gives us depth and doesn’t need any stupid adjustment period.

Edu's fake passport

Between Flamini & Paulineho, on today’s performance, you would think The Frenchman was £17m & Pauline was the freebie.


HAHAA drown me in you sweet tears of envy!!!

Big O'Dread

He’s handsome, he’s French, He’s Giroud! FOYS! Spend all ya want, ya still Shite and always will be..


Szczcsezny’s kicking was pretty crap, he needs to practice. Giroud was immense, his effort was incredible, and his effectiveness holding the ball and winning headers suggests to me its be worth seeing how he performed with 2 up front


Wow – how could you find a negative?


You don’t think he practices that? I’m thinking they might make him take some kicks in training. His distribution issues are about decision-making and concentration, not lack of practice.


Which is why we had gone after Suarez and not Higuain…


Daddy was a gamblin’ man, and Momma a truck-stop whore…
One-Nil to the Arsenal Stan, now see your arse out the back-room door.


aww man – AngryAtArsene was my target, this post makes no sense w/o that brashness.


you sound like a fantastic person


this was irony for this FuryAtWenger-guy.

Daft Aider

Welcome back Flamini, one of the few who left in “iffy” circumstances that I have been glad to see return, never mind your £20mil for Cabaye poor quality jokes

Santi cazorlas coming to town

Can’t stop smiling!


That, in my eyes, is a contender for goal of the season. On another topic, my wife almost had an ogasm whe Olivier took his shirt off!!


Have to say Flamini looked the part today. Thought he was our suprise today. Are we gonna have one tomorrow? 😉


if the thumbs down is what you want your doing it right. get a life dude!


that was for furywenger something nobody


Giroud obvious MOTM today, but it was an immense collective effort by the lads today. Almost as if they had something to prove on behalf of their manager. Special kudos goes to Per, Kos, Rambo, Gibbs and Santi all of whom were absolute class today. Fuck I love this team!


Jesus and SZCZ too how could I forget him!

Parisian Weetabix

I thought Jesus went to City.

Thin Gooner

Tottenham: where the players look as chavvy as the fans.


People talk about Giroud but I’m a bit scared about loosing my girlfriend to Ramsey, she was drooling all over him throughout the match and now is Googling him. Should I be worried??

(Regardless up the Arsenal great game from the boys today!)


You should be worried…very worried…


Kicked them right in their free spending holes!
Off now to read me some Spurs blogs. Ohhh the tears! Yummy.


Looks like Arseblog had a good mood while writing this piece. Well, who of us didn’t right?

Mayor of the Woolwich

Cazorla-9/10: He ripped a fucking spud apart, coupled with all the good work he did. He obviously understands everything about NLD!


Well i’ll be the first to admit that flamini surprised me….had be eating a humble pie. Still think the squad is thin and Giroud can do better.

Parisian Weetabix

Giroud can do better?

Explain one way in which Giroud could have done better today? Would you have him take a leaf out of Soldado’s £26m book? The commentators were saying today “Soldado’s the kind of striker you don’t see all game, until he puts the ball in the back of the net.” Well they were half right, weren’t they. I barely remember him playing. Whereas I couldn’t help but see Giroud. He was everywhere, winning headers, scoring goals, creating chances, linking up play, clearing goalbound shots off the fucking line! EXPLAIN HOW HE COULD DO BETTER.

Mezermisation of Madness

Totally agree, Giroud was amazing today.
Some of his through passes for Theo was a bit sloppy, but the man absolutely terrorizes the Spuds today .. he was beautiful as well. *sigh*


You sir know very little about the game. Giroud was the best player on the pitch today.


Flamini should get an 8.5.When was the last time you saw an Arsenal player shake his fist.A real leader.Must start

Except for the assist Walcott was poor.And Cazorla again disappeared in a big game

Szczesny played well but i want an experienced keeper signed


Ahhh Cazorla disappeared – so that’s why Spurs played like they couldn’t see him.


What game were you watching? Arsenal made SEVEN key passes and guess who made the most: Surprise for you Cazorla. Arsenal important moments: on 7 minutes Cazorla long magical pass to Giroud; 23 minutes: Cazorla’s early vertical pass after few turns and twists finds Ramsey who passes to Rosicky to Walcott To Giroud’s goal; 33 minutes: inside from the left Cazorla put walcot on goal which would have been a goal if it was a better touch player, 62 minutes: Cazorla key pass through Giroud, the only time we created a key pass without cazorla being involved was on 70… Read more »


so proud of the team
Ozil and Cabaye and we have the needed depth

Mikel Artekkers

Sir Chesney gets a 15/10 for this:


Player ratings against Sp*rs always seem so academic when we win as a team.

Today we won as a team. And that includes the fans.


Eleanor great point about fans.
Arseblog should have a fan rating score to keep us on our toes.
Flamini was just the type of leader on the pitch we need.


Were in advance talks with Ozil, title contenders baby

Yankee Gooner

I know LANS is worn out, but holy shit Arteta and Ox coming back into the squad makes me feel positively giddy.


You forgot about Lu-lu-lu-lu-Lukas Podolski! Bring on Ozil and Ba and who knows we might be challengers.


Per’s thoughts during that gif:

“Aaaand I’ll take that. Thanks bitch!”

Andy Mack

Jack Wilshere: 7/10 – Played through a stomach problem, had to go off as he could smell poo and thought he’d had an accident.. Forgetting that the smell was the 5pud2 …


Damn it blogs! I keep watching that interception by Mert over and over again. How fucking cool was that! Thats how you defend! And for all the pundits deriding him for his lack of pace. Piss off! He is better than any of England’s bloody Centrebacks!


All the pundits are full of shit big Per is awesome and I also think he had a lot to do with Kos’s big improvement.


Giroud was monstrous in the air today. Best performance I’ve seen of him in an Arsenal shirt.

I'm Szczesny and I know it

Wenger on Sagna’s and Wilshere’s stomach bug:

“Yes. What has happened to us, happened to Tottenham a few years ago.”
Love Wenger kicking them while they are down! Lasagne!


Kieran Gibbs, MOTM. Had a tough assignment and was always, always there. Never been my favorite, but his peformance was solid from stat to finish.


Money doesnt buy success…please read soccernomics….fed up of alll the low intelligence arsenal fans who want wenger out.. the guy is a genius….


I hope harry will be twitching tonight on motd. powershift my arse. only way spurs will get 4th is if moyes continues to fuck up at utd. a lovely day today.

Red Cannon

I actually don’t think that Moyes is fucking up at United. He’s actually got them above mid-table, which is about where their mediocre team belongs. I just think Ferguscum kept them playing far above their abilities for the past two years. Either way, though, I’m quite happy for them to be struggling.


This. An injury to carrick and rvp and they are in the bottom half.


A lot of talk of playing two up front, but it seems like that’s effectively what’s happening with theo when Cazorla is on the wing. Santi tends to drift into the middle and theo pushes up. Don’t know if this is intentional But it seems to be working. COYG!


Long lonely walk back to the crap part of north london, was it then?

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