Thursday, June 1, 2023

Mertesacker becomes latest to change number

After Alexis Sanchez and Aaron Ramsey changed numbers for next season, and Granit Xhaka handed the number 16 for his debut campaign with the club, Per Mertesacker has become the latest Arsenal player to switch numerals.

However, the German has bucked the trend for a slightly lower digit, and instead will sport a clip-art bee on his back.


“Bees are our friends,” said the BFG. “I wanted to highlight the issue of the bee population dying out.

“It’s suggested that Colony Collapse Disorder that has wiped out an estimated 10 million beehives in North America alone, and the western honey bee is in real danger.

“Not fake danger like when Gareth Bale falls over when someone tries to tackle him, but REAL danger like when someone tries to talk to Mesut when Flamini is around.”

Mertesacker’s status as one of the senior players at the club was the only reason the move was sanctioned, with Arsene Wenger immediately dismissing Hector Bellerin’s request to change from 24 to a bolt of lightning emoji.

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What next? Ozil change from 11 to Flamini’s caricature on his back?


Come on man. It’s not even April 1st.


We’ve got a Bee Friendly German
A Bee Friendly Geeerman

Ozil's a Gunner

I just don’t think you understand

Ozil's a Gunner

why the downvotes?I was continuing the chant
Or have you guys forgotten the ozil chant?


No you weren’t

Ozil's a Gunner

I’m sorry if I sent the wrong signals
But how was I not continuing the chant?

jack jack jack

wrong chant ya silly sausage

Hamburg Gooner

Thing is: Özil is not the ´Big Fucking German`… he´s the other one (with another song ..)


How ironic

Arsene's handkerchief

Alexis ?
Ozil ??
Jack ?
Theo ?


Wishere ?
Rosicky ?
Flamini ?
Coquilin ?
Ozil ?
Xhaka ?
Cech ?


A slow news day


Sources close to Mertesacker said the Bee was initially selected over the Arsenal defender’s confusion of the first letter of his nickname, BFG. The big German was quick to dismiss that with a rather embarrased wave of his tree branch arms.



David C

Mert creating a bit of buzz today with this announcement.

But seriously, if you have a garden then grow some veggies and plants instead of a pointless lawn. Bumble bees really love my garlic chives!


Rumour has it Podolski is changing his number to the Laughing With Tears Emoji, what with all the bantz he has.


Did you see him square up to the pile of sh*t that is RvP in the turkish cup final and then go on to score the only goal of the game for the bantz

Cliff Bastin

No but I will now.


I did not see this, but like Cliff, I will now!

Ox in the Box

Please take my money, I want this so bad.

Bees are awesome, they give us honey. Unlike wasps, who are just assholes in general. Mourinho is a wasp, he should get a shirt with it and ‘Asshole’ written under it.


Don’t knock wasps! Wasps eat huge amounts of pests which can damage plants, and provide a source of food for numerous other animals higher up the food chain. I see Mourinho more as lungworm or an aggressive tumour.

David C

Mourinho’s a grub; he lies on his belly all day like a snake and eat’s the roots of your lawn. Only the noble skunk eats grubs, but even then the skunk ruins your lawn. A lose-lose situation, like his appointment at Man U will be!

Godfrey Twattschlock

Mourinho is shit wrapped in skin!


So if you cut him open it says “Tottenham” down the middle?


Class banter

Stewart Robson's therapist

Seeing as the 34 thing isn’t happening with Xhaka, anyone else thinking that the plan is to give him the 4 when Per’s finished with it?


After saying that squad number changes are the most read articles on this site, you post fake news with a headline about a player changing his shirt number? A cynic might think you posted this just to boost page views on a slow news day.


Interesting argument you have constructed.

On the other hand it the reason for this could be BANTZ!


Blogs the years or unmatched professional news reporting gives you the right to write some fun stuff from time to time and not explain why you did to whoever.

Indian Gooner

What’s up Piers Morgan’s tweet relating Ozil being linked with other teams?
I know he is a prick but still..
Is Barca trying to fuck us right in the back after realising chasing Hector is going to go in vain?
That tweet’s got me worried ever since I read it!


The solution is to never read or listen to anything from Piss Moanan.
The type that when it goes well he’s got nothing to offer.


Personally I think Ozil is happy in London and Arsenal and will stay. He is using the Euros to pressure Arsenal into buying more Top quality players especially upfront which has been not up to his standards.

Ray from Norfolk, Virginia

A stylized gigantic fully erect phallus for Olivier Giroud instead of the number 12.
That will land more often on the score-sheet. It will also intimidate the opposition.


Agreed. Very intimidating like King Henry VIII’s armour…tee hee.


🙂 apparently you three have seen the King’s armour!

Georgy Charles

With all these changes, it’s bee-n a hive of activity at The Emirates


This is just getting silly now. Bring back the bog standard 1-11 I say.


Actually, Iwobi’s the latest to change his number: 45 to 17


And now Iwobi’s taken #17, it’s a hell of a reshuffle


I enjoyed watching Rosicky today playing for Czech Republic against Malta, he completed 65 minutes unscathed
off the topic may be but I thought you might be interested.

Dave A.

Bet he likes his women how he likes his coffee: covered in bees

Brian Dawes

Does BFG mean Tottenham Collapse Disorder?


Walcott should get an emoji poo on his back !!


Iwobi has changed his number to 17 though… Bonafide first team player now

Andrew with an A

1-11 doesn’t exist in modern football. we have two guys figting for most positions. way too much rotation positionally. Cazorla has gone from AM to DM Ramsey has played RM as well as DM even AM when Ozil was injured. That’s as well as the insane amount of rotation. 1-11 died in the 90’s

Stuck on repeat...

If only this was true!

Wenga Boys

hehehhee. bees are funny. this post is funny. i am now happy.


Naija Gunner

Ten pooos for u blogs!

Wes Andersen

Bee F G Love it.

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