Ramsey: The banter is flying

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Aaron Ramsey says that the Wales squad are in great shape for the upcoming European Championships, and that the togetherness is being fostered by some ribald messaging via WhatsApp.

This is the first time Wales have qualified for a major international tournament since 1958, and with quality like Ramsey, Gareth Bale, Ashley Williams and Christ Gunter in the squad, they have high hopes for France this summer.

Preparations have already begun, and the Arsenal midfielder says the fact that they’re super best friends is playing a part.

“We’re a good group of lads, we all understand our roles and responsibilities on the pitch but also we enjoy each others company; we’re quite a closely knit group,” he said.

“We’re on a WhatsApp group, the banter is flying on it.”

Asked to expand on that, he continued, “Just the other day there was a message from Joe Allen taking the mickey out of one of the other guys about his haircut.

“As quick as you like I went on WhatsApp and said ‘It’s a bit much for you to criticise somebody’s haircut when you have a beard which is like having a haircut on your face.

“And before he could reply I then said ‘And I know I also have a beard so I think that’s check-mate, Joe!’. I showed it to Williamsy and we both laughed out loud and also put in the crying with laughter emoji in another message.

“Not long after that, we saw Gareth Bale in the shower and because he’s living in Spain he’s got a tan because the climate in Spain is much more favourable than it is in England or indeed Wales. They have many more days of sunshine than we do, that’s the natural order of things and I suppose that’s why so many people from the United Kingdom go on holidays there.

“So when he was in the shower we saw that he had tan-lines and I thought of something really funny and I said it to Joe Ledley and he burst out laughing and said ‘You have to say that’ and I said ‘Maybe it’s a bit mean’ but he said ‘No it’s not’ so I did it and sent a WhatsApp which said ‘Gareth, you have a big white arse’, and now everybody calls him ‘WhiteArse’, which is hilarious.”

But as well as being the dispenser of banter, Ramsey is happy to be the recipient too.

“It wouldn’t be fair if I was the only one zinging them with hot burns,” he said, “so I have to take my fair share.

“After I said to Hal Robson-Kanu ‘How’s your Dad, Nwanko?’ because it’s the same name as Kanu who played for Arsenal so there’s an ever so nice Arsenal connection there for me, he replied ‘I’m gonna stick your face on a George Foreman grill you dull c*nt’.

“I almost wet myself with the laughter but I didn’t really it’s just a saying to get across that I found it really, really funny.

“I mean, George Foreman doesn’t do grills, he plays that tiny guitar thing.”

wales_whatsapp_banter

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Arsene-al fan

Not sure I believe all of that. The main topic of Welsh conversation is the sheep sh*gging in my experience and they haven’t mentioned that once.

Arsene-al fan

Quite a few Welsh people on here by the look of it.

Bob's Mexican Cousin

Don’t forget the politically correct folks out there.

Gandalf the Gooner

its funny the first 10 times at most, after that I just think people have poor chat if that’s their go to joke re: Wales.

Danny

Yeah that’s so true, the sheep shagging thing is old hat. The Welsh people I know are more likely to shag their sister!

RedCurrabt

Either that or people just don’t fully appreciate your comedic genius.

Gooner4Life

Ahhahahahaha .. thats the funniest thing iv read today

4thplacetrophy

Blogs this is some funny shit! Haha… Just imagine poor Aaron reading this, he’d be horrified. You’ve absolutely murdered him! I do reckon I have more personality in one of my pubic hairs than Aaron does in his whole body though.

Gutbukket Deffrolla

I lived in Wales for a few years and I never once saw anybody try to shag a sheep. With or without a four foot length of rope and yellow wellies (apparently this is the best way, but I learned that in Australia). I did, however, see one guy shag an armchair whilst loudly declaring his eternal love to her (it), with his jocks round his ankles, in a student disco, on the dance floor, in front of close on a hundred until-then mostly innocent people, in Wales. Yes he was Welsh. It must have been true love because he… Read more »

Danny

Bloody armchair fans!

Cracked

Fun fact of the day.

The reputation the welsh have for sheep stems from an old medieval law.
I might be a bit fuzzy on the details, but loosely speaking the penalty for stealing someone else’s livestock was harsher than the penalty for fornicating with said livestock.

Faced with the prospect of losing limbs for stealing sheep (It was a simpler time) many would be cattle thieves preferred to admit to doing the naughty with the cattle instead.

Thus giving rise to the notion that the welsh love them some sheep.

The more you know and all that.

Arsene-al fan

Not that a sheep was their only chance?

Big Mad Andy

No way! That’s great, living on the border of Wales I’ll get that into conversation soon…

Tom

Surely if they had been sagging cattle they would be known as cow shaggers?

gee

according to david cameron the english like getting blown by pigs.

GeneWildersCrazyDNA

I don’t know what’s real anymore.

GeneWildersCrazyDNA

I don’t want to know.

Goon

Have you ever had a dream, Neo, that you were so sure was real? What if you were unable to wake from that dream? How would you know the difference between the dream world and the real world? This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the blue pill – the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill – you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes.

GeneWildersCrazyDNA

Morpheus… are you trying to seduce me? There’s definite homo-erotic undertones in your pitch… Just to clarify: you want to drug me, and take me into a deep hole you refer to as ‘Wonderland’?

GeneWildersCrazyDNA

Screw it, if you can get that cute mysterious emo chick from the 7-11, Trinny I think, in on this drug-fuelled swingers party then I’m in. Just don’t let things get too ‘weird’. Last thing I want is to spend 6hours with a loose grip on reality doing random shit only to get to the end and wonder what on earth just happened.

goonshow

Sheez – what these interlulls can do a an other-wise semi-intelligent bogshite… er, I mean blogsite.

Yeti

No way! You can keep your pills.
I might wake up as Mourinho, or even worse… John Terry’s missus!!

Yeti

Urghhhh… That is fucking disgusting.
Can’t believe I have to feel that.

Arsene-al fan

St Totteringham’s Day is real.

GeneWildersCrazyDNA

This year it was rather surreal.

Surreally good.

Arsene-al fan

And looks like some Sp*rs fans on here too…

(Or is that you Gareth?).

Keith

Gareth Bale’s white ass is.

Gutbukket Deffrolla

Sociedad?

Crash Fistfight

I think some of this might not be true. I’m sure nobody would call Rambo a “dull c*nt”.

the american

Let the creative summer articles begin! only ~10 weeks til the new season gents

Gooniegoogoo

Ghris C*nter

goonero

Hahahaha blogs I know Rambo isn’t the most captivating guy in interviews but no one on Earth is THIS dry!

Hutch

One of your best yet, Mr Blogs.

Well played.

Third Plebeian

Agreed. He wrote that ever so well.

Holyviper

Talk about an unreliable narrator experience. 😀 😀 😀

goonshow

But probably better than an unnarratable Reliant experience?

Gooner Mon

I swear Blogs enjoys mocking Ramsey a bit too much. It’s ok though because he does it “ever so well”!

Spangoolies

wow Ramsey’s not that funny ‘white arse’ wot?

Overthegoon

Whoooosh!! That’s the sound of it going right on past you

Marven

if any one has to read between the lines he will understand that Bale is coming to Arsenal….

Arseblood

Ramsey v Milner….now that would be conversation worth sleeping through.

assistantref

Michael Owen could commentate on it. That would be peak boring.

Goontang

Bant-man

rohit

Ramsey, eh? getting into the details ever so well….:)

king henry

You don’t have to be crazy to play here, but it helps.

Denchmania

poo-meter. anyone?

Wenga Boys

Typical top bantz from The Arlo.

Thaatarsenalguy

Cmon blogs we don’t want this escalating into a boring James Milner situation, save it for when he leaves us for Madrid

Stewart Robson's therapist

If you want to emulate Beckham, Aaron, feel free to stop at the hair and the modelling. The painful interviews are a step too far.

Yuck Fu

Read the whole article from the 4th paragraph down with a welsh accent inner monologue.

goonshow

Is that near Inner Mongologuia?

Juan Cornetto

Someone lock this guy up in Bantanemo Bay.

Jimdinho

I really, really hope he makes too much money as a footballer so that he is never tempted to give punditry or commentating a go

CJ

no such thing as too much money, mate.
Henry made a ton and look where he is now.

Chris

Yeah, sitting next to Mr Fucking Charisma every week on my telly. I’d sooner shave my fucking lips off.

Feed the Ox

Brilliant…I am on the train crying with laughter. ‘I’m gonna stick your face on a George Foreman grill you dull cunt’ will live long in the memory.

Could they do a Leicester?

Gutbukket Deffrolla

No, Wales aren’t allowed to compete in the Premier League. 🙂

goonshow

baddabing!

Cliff Bastin

Between this article and the Jack Wilshere wants to play in central midfield I think it’s fair to say the arseblog newshound isn’t taking the offseason too well. Are you OK bro

ramgooner

The bond is so strong that when Gareth got a call from Ramsey he jumped out of his bed because he thought it was Ramsey Colleen.

Goonerboy

With “Christ” Gunter in the squad, this really is the second coming of Wales to a major championship.

Anup

Blogs, you’ve outdone yourself again! This is epic

santori

Ramsey should be playing in the slot as an option to Ozil IMO. He is an incredibly creative player. As the link player, he needs more positional discipline. We have seen with Elneny against City that even the favorite at the moment was caught up field on 3 ocassions leading to dangerous breakaways against us. Had this been Flamini or Ramsey, there would have been much constenation. Ramsey fared well with Flamini holding in a period when we were shorn of some of our better assets up top, less so with Coquelin. With Jack back in the squad (and Elneny)… Read more »

goonshow

What??? Some serious football talk??? Santa – ya dull c**t! Now go to the kitchen and press your face to Foreman grill (or his ukulele if you can’t find the grill!)

Merlin's Panini

WhiteArse. Haha. That’s what I’m calling Bale from now on.