Friday, December 9, 2022

Report: Monza join list of Italian suitors for Pablo Mari

Serie A side Monza are the latest side to enquire after Pablo Mari, according to reports in Italy.

Promoted to the Italian top flight for the first time in their 110-year history following a play-off win in May, they are splashing the cash in a bid to strengthen ahead of the new campaign.

Monza’s financial muscle comes from Italy’s former Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi whose holding company Fininvest acquired the club in 2018.

Pablo spent the second half of last season on loan with Udinese but they didn’t have the money to keep him around. AC Milan and Hellas Verona have also been linked.

Whether he fits the bill for Monza is up for debate. It turns out 85-year-old Berlusconi – he of the ‘bunga bunga’ parties and major corruption scandals – reportedly has some weirdly strict criteria for new signings, including no beards, no tattoos, no earrings and neatly styled hair.

While Pablo can have a shave without too much hassle, the real blocker for the Spaniard is his nationality…he’d have to pretend he’s Italian.

Mad. But very Berlusconi.

Elsewhere, reports in France claim Folarin Balogun is being tracked by Ligue 1 side Reims who’ve recently loaned star striker Hugo Ekitike to Paris Saint Germain for the season.

There’s talk of a season-long loan. Given his credentials, we suspect they won’t be the only ones who have made an approach.

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C.B.

Mari has to go, he can’t be 5th choice at Arsenal, he’ll rarely get a game.

georgekorda

Wow, look how many boxes Mari ticks regarding Monza’s checklist. If you add that he has the right amount of legs and supposedly teeth, he must be the ideal signing for the Berlusconi club.

Johnny 4 Hats

I guess we just wait now for the shocking realisation that Monza will struggle to pay his wages.

That seems to be the theme of this window.

Chipper49

I’m just trying to figure out why Reims are loaning a striker to PSG…

Chipper 49

Thanks, that helps make some sense of it.

Arsenio

Same as that mbappe bloke… except that one was 5x higher value.

Badaab

the same reason german clubs all funnel their talent to bayern

Arsemouth

He can have a career in Italy or Portugal. I hope he realises that and pushes for a move.

Qwaliteee

Another one who, with the best will in the world, isn’t up to the ‘next level’ standard that we all know what the club is pushing for.

I hope something can be sorted out soon for the benefit of both the player and Arsenal.

I wish him well.

Man Manny

Enough of suitors! One of them should just pay the dowry and get the wedding done.

Mayor McCheese

At 85, though, Berlusconi might have some trouble consummating the deal.

RajuBhai

You might might be surprised ….

Forrest Moore

No tattoos??? … Monza have no hope with that nutter in charge…

Yellow Ribbon

Looks like Pop Pops is one tough man to please.

Yellow Ribbon

I haven’t laughed so hard in a long long time. Had to read the rules laid down at their club again and again and again. I mean I thought it was Mr. Blogs with his usual banter but then I just saw the tweet. Jeez😳😂🤣

Goonerrific

Literally, checked my watch. Nope, not April 1st

Chuck Felsea

Would be interesting if someone made an all star 11 of active players that meet these criteria. Like what would be the best team in theory, assuming they would all be willing to join this nutter club.

A Different George

I think there will probably be hesitation about going there for a lot of players, but the free haircut ought to seal it.

Chuck Felsea

Actually this rule reminded me of the rumoured Kim Jong Un list of accepted hairstyles in North Korea.

Badaab

who would have thought a neo-fascist like berlusconi would have insane rules about the appearance and nationality of players… lmao

Fletcher

Dear Arteta, kindly offload fast and get Tielemans….

Scwibble

Honestly, the sooner the better imo. Ideally would have wanted the offloads done before start of season, you don’t want them just hanging around.

Arsenio

Don’t Sevilla need some new CB’s? They sold both of theirs…

RajuBhai

Wonder if Pablo would be interested in joining a club run by a fascist

Chuck Felsea

Where is Di Canio when you need him? Maybe they could dig out that guy again for the “project”. Ah no, he has that Mussolini tattoo.
To be honest, even if it would be good for the club to “offload” Pablo, but you wouldn’t wanna make any kind of pressure on the player to join that bunch.

Mpls

“Italian Suitors”
harrharr!
😂😂😂

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