Monday, December 23, 2024

Make a film title pun from a striker’s name

We’ve seen Arsenal linked to countless forwards this summer, how much truth there is any of those links is open to question.

Our guess would be ‘not much’, but it doesn’t change the fact we need a striker and people are getting restless. So, in order to pass the time, we’ve decided to play a little game: work a player’s name into the title of a film.

You can use first name or surname, but the film must exist. You can also use any striker you like, rather than just the ones we’ve been reported to be interested in.

Here are a few to kick you off with, please add your own in the comments.

Bacca to the Future

Lukaku’s Talking

Higuaindecent Exposure

Y Tu Benzemama Tambien

Gomez Congeniality

Throw Aubama from the train

Lacazette aux Folles

The Big Lewandowski

Right, you creative pun geniuses, do your stuff.

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ChrisM

Carry on Campo!

ChrisM

(I’m aware he’s not a striker, still had to)

tom

Denis the Menice

Eternal Titi Berg Pat Nostalgia

I as in Icardi

Wayne

Mad morata

IamaGoober

I know what we didn’t do last summer

The good, the Sanogo and the Ugly

Jurassic Park:
The Lost Chu-young

Giroudfellas

Third Plebeian

The Dalglish Patient

Eternal Titi Berg Pat Nostalgia

Auba and war lord Shaka- Conquest of the Emirate.

Ebo

The Prince van Persia
I, Robben
East of Eden Hazard
Lukaku’s Talking Now
Serpico Aguero
La Villa En Rose
Saving Private Robben
The Thierryminator
Hulk Fiction
Klose Encounters of the Third Kuyt

Ebo

* The Prince of Persie

Cornelius P. Snuffington III

B for Benzema.

Bosscielny

The dark Wright. It’s not racist, is it? Btw pogba to utd shows that money is the single most important criteria in transfers. How else do you explain a world class player going from Italian champions to a team in europa league. We on the other hand are always looking for a bargain, something which a cultured left foot touched on in his blog a few days ago. Why are we told that players like Griezmann and Aubemayang are out of our reach? Why don’t we put in a 75 million quid bid and check the resolve of their parent… Read more »

Cornelius P. Snuffington III

That’s a pretty long and complicated pun, but I’m afraid I don’t get the reference.

Bosscielny

I included the synopsis too. 😛

Sancheezy

Droga does Dallas.
Willy Walcott and the chocolate factory.

Bob's Mexican Cousin

Not sure if he’s a striker…

Third Plebeian

The Wright Stuff

Rocky

“John Terry Is A Complete Thundercunt”

OK, I know this isn’t a film title but the player exists and it is factually correct

Gary Baldy

I presumed it was a Mad Max reference.
In fact, I wouldn’t have realised apart from the fact you mentioned it !!!!

Thumbs Up all round !

😀

Mr November

Van Wilder: Icardi Liason

Rossi88

You missed this surely….Van Persies Party Liason?!

Gooner

BenTekken

Cygan's meatball

Aubameyango and cash

George

AubameayangoUnchained

PeteyB

I’d rather see Sanogo Unchained

Mr November

Good Will Grigg

Third Plebeian

Some other classic Matt Damon films include:

The Martial
The Bourne Identiti
The Bourne Supremessi
The Talented Mr. Lupoli

O-Bman-Kenobi

The Hasselbaink Redemption. Carry on Gudjohnsen. Kroos Conrool (Made up 80’s action film I must admit).

Jayhouserock

Speed 2 was subtitled cruise control

Tom Gun

Or the Shawcross Redemption. Obviously this is a movie that will never be made as he doesn’t deserve redemption, the leg snapping orc!

Although I would consider making the movie if he snapped John Terry in half. Not just his leg. The whole thing. In two.

Cornelius P. Snuffington III

It’s the story of how one Stoke cunt jumped in front of a runaway car to save the life of Aaron Ramsey.

Stig

The Shawcross Redemption ofcourse?

Ryan C

Bent it like Beckham?

Griez

Ted E.

“Bendtner like Beckham”, or “The Dane always ring twice”.

Ryan C

I was thinking about the one season wonder Darren Bent that everyone wanted. I wouldn’t dare mess with the name of the Lord.

Going ahead with one season wonders-
Charlie Austin Powers-the spy who..
Michu Black (meet Joe Black)
Carroll
The last air Benteker(Bendtner would fit so well here.. But I’m not blasphemous. No.)
Big bucks Benny (McCarthy)
The good Johnson

And the latest transient hit – The longest Vard(y)

ChrisM

Lupolian Dynamite

leighdickson

Love that one!

Third Plebeian

Since we’re going with failed Arsenal strikers here:

The Sunu Also Rises

Third Plebeian

And that famous Spielberg film from the eighties: J.E.T.

lol
Arsical

Icardi Jones and the Temple of Doom

Third Plebeian

Indiana Jones and the Last Kroosade

BushLeagues

can tv count?

Gignac Horseman.

Goonertilidie

The Good, the Bad and the Icardi

ChrisM

Good Will Huntelaar

leeroy

Karim on up the Dybala

(two in one)

GUN

The curious case of Tomas Rosicky. Not a striker but…

Danny

Lawrence of Olivier Giroud

Danny

I’ve got that wrong haven’t I? I wanna change my answer to Deer Hunterlaar, or if that’s already been said, Ben Hur(st). And if not that then just simply ‘Ronaldo’

GUN

Posted this because of that arseblog article about his footballing age.

Third Plebeian

The Curious Case of Benayoun’s Button

Third Plebeian

The Curious Case of Christopher Sutton

Some Gun

Henry There Yet

newxieland

Thierry Up There

90s Kevin Bacon basketball movie for those don’t know.

Third Plebeian

Regarding Henry

George Jameson

The Shawcross redemption

George

The Pellephant Man

Third Plebeian

A Pelle 13

serotonin

The Taking of Pelle One Two Three

The Mert

The Last of the Messihicans

serotonin

Il Messia

leeroy

Gonzalo in 60 seconds

Per's Plums

Total Henrycall

Dan

The Incredible Hulk

Florin

The Good, the Ba and the Ugly

Third Plebeian

Cannonba Run

Tiramisu

The Good, the Bad and the Tevez

EdtheRed

Three men and a Bebé

StaceySlater

THIS is the best one

all the entries though have been fantastic. today is a good ass day

Arjan Banerjee

This is beautiful.

George

Saving Kluivert Ryan, also

Con

hahaha that’s great

IanB

Sanogo Unchained
The Bony dentity
Ince-eption
Deeney Darko
Vardy-go
Saving Private Rondon
Silence of the Longs
One flew over Lukaku’s Nest

Third Plebeian

Jackie De Bruyne

Thierry Walcott

Pinky and De Bruyne

Fabulous

Gonzalo with the wind

Third Plebeian

Payet Forward

Goonertilidie

Alexis in Wonderland

50 Shades of Gandalf the Grey

50 Shades of Greizman

leeroy

Emanuelle Eboue.

I take it blue films are allowed?

Third Plebeian

Origi

p

No Vardy for Old Men
The Grizz Mile
The Times of Arek Milik

gambon

Dont want to say mine are best….but:

Morata Kombat
Citizen Kane
Weekend at Borinis
Bas Dost Boot
The Deer Huntelaar

Third Plebeian

Watt’s Eating Gilbert Grape

IanB

Austin Space

Third Plebeian

Lost in Space is actually a Theo Walcott biopic.

Yankee Gooner

You rejoinders are killing me, man! Excellent!

soothsayer

House of icardi

goonerjim87

Can’t think of film names, but had good laugh with this type of thing and band names.

Granit Street Preachers

D

Mandzukic of Steel

Alex

The Big Lewandowski

Alex

Nevermind I just saw it in the post -_-

gambon

ET the extra Torrestrial

Third Plebeian

The Lord of the Rings: The Two Torres

Forceoffice

Moratatouille

Third Plebeian

Matatouille also works.

ChrisM

One Flew Over Lukaku’s Nest

Yorkshire Gunner

Tinker theirry soldier spy?

Gunnertron

Ginter Taylor Amdy Faye

icardiogram

CHICHARITO CATCH A THIEF
FRED WITH BENEFITS
THE CREDIBLE HULK
ASANO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN
VANITY PERSIE FAIR
ZLATANGLED

serotonin

ZlaTango in Paris

Cliff Bastin

Romeo and Julian Draxler

Adriano

Action Jackson Martinez (Carl Weathers is one fine actor!)

Tom Thumb

Wayne Rooney’s World

kreebilicus

Jurassic Park Chu-young

kreebilicus

Ocean’s Elevennegoor of Hesselink

Parisian Weetabix

Churassic Park?

soothsayer

The incredible Hulk

Stringer Bell

The Bergkamp of Alcatraz

leeroy

Ba Wars: A New Hope

Coquelin's 3rd leg

Ba Wars: Breel Embolo Strikes Back.

Third Plebeian

Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Bacca

ChrisM

The Grapes Of Braithwaite

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